Cold as Fire
by OcherMe
Summary: Edward has been infected with a virus, long thought to have been extinct, designed solely to feed on vampires. A virus famous for its deadly effectiveness. As time works against them, Edward and Bella are forced to ask: Is death the end? Complete
1. Prologue

_Hey, I'm back! Much sooner than I expected as well. This story has just been flying from me though, I wrote six chapters in three days! If that's not crazy, than I don't know what is. Anyways, I'm really really really really excited to know what you all think, so you have to review! I'm so anxious! This story is completely independant from my last one, so you don't have to have read it to understand this one. This takes place after New Moon and is completely from Bella's POV, so I won't announce it at the beginning of each chapter._

_So I decided to have a prologue for this story for the first time ever. It just fit. So that's why this chapter is so short. It's just meant to hook you in:) Since I'm on summer vacation I should be able to update fairly consistantly, probably every other day. _

_I have to give a million thanks so Mysticstar who is being a wonderful beta reader, catching all my stupid mistakes. So, thank her when you notice how error free this is:) (although, don't blame her if there are still mistakes, after all, we're only human). _

_Sorry about the long author's note. Enjoy!_

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"Stay with me," my voice was barely audible. His beautiful amber eyes were fighting to stay open and I knew it was almost over.

"Bella," the voice was weak; I could barely hear it in the pounding rain. God, please don't let this be happening. It wasn't fair, not after everything we'd be through.

I tried to talk; tried to assure him that everything was going to be fine, that I wouldn't let him die, but no words could find their way through my tears. There were a million things I wanted to say, and now in our final moments together, I could manage none. Life was so cruel.

A slight gasp came from the failing body in my arms and I shook my head, willing myself to wake up, to escape this horrible dream. Lightening brightened the room, illuminating the five other vampires surrounding us. I paid them no notice. Nothing else could even begin to take my attention away at this moment; the only thing that mattered was him, my love.

"Be safe," he whispered, attempting a weak smile. My own heart seemed to stop cold.

"No Edward," I desperately hugged his body to me, trying to make every moment we had left last as long as possible. "I won't let you die."

It was too late.

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_Review!_


	2. Fast

_Ok, so here is the official start of the story! Ya! I just want to warn that this story is very Edward-angst oriented. It's one of my favorites that I've ever written though:) _

_If there are any questions or confusion, don't be afraid to ask. I have tried to make everything as clear as possible, but sometimes things make sense in my head but not in others. I will try as best as I can to answer any questions. _

_I don't think I have anything else to say, so Enjoy! (and review!!!)_

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It was raining, as usual. I stood outside, slowly starting to look like a drenched cat, as I waited for my obnoxiously late vampire. Briskly jumping up and down to keep myself warm I couldn't help but worry. I don't think I ever remember Edward being late before.

Just as I was about to give up all hope of being rescued from my involuntary shower and walk home, a car pulled into the parking lot. I squinted at it, not quite believing what I was seeing. It was a stunning yellow ­­­­­­­­­­­­­­Lamborghini Murcielago, I hadn't seen one before in Forks, and that was definitely the kind of car that one remembers when they see it. What shocked me even more was seeing Edward behind the wheel.

He screeched dramatically to a halt in front of me and shut the motor off before deftly joining me in the rain.

"Getting wet?" he laughed and I glared at him. I couldn't be mad at him for too long however, my curiosity about the car getting the better of me.

"Get a new car?" I shouted through the rain, though I knew he could hear me perfectly well. Edward chuckled, a mischievous grin on his face.

"No," he said bluntly. I pursed my lips, unwilling to join into his little game. The one where I was always asking stupid questions. When he finally realized I wasn't going to say anything he raised his hands and tossed me something. "You got a new car." I stared dumbly at the shiny keys in my hand, my mouth falling open unattractively. Edward laughed openly. Stupid selfless vampire.

"Happy graduation!" he exclaimed scooping me into his arms and pressing his lips to mine. I couldn't think of anything to say. After he returned me to my feet I just stared at the car in front of me, blinking a few times just to make sure this wasn't a trick of my mind.

"Edward," I managed to find my voice. "This…this is too much." Edward laughed again.

"You don't know what you're talking about," he escorted me towards the driver's seat. "Now get in." Not too unwillingly, I complied. My door had barely shut when Edward was climbing into the passenger seat. He gazed at me, a wide grin plastered to his face. Soon he grabbed my hand with the key and inserted it into the ignition.

"Now turn," he instructed, as if I were slightly slow in the head. Come to think of it, I probably was. I complied and the engine roared to life. Snapping out of my daze I shifted it into drive and eagerly pressed my foot to the gas pedal. Before I knew it we were cruising down the street, relishing in the power of the vehicle. We had barely made it too the outskirts of town when Edward chuckled under his breath.

"What?" I asked, glancing at his amused face.

"Look at the speedometer," he instructed and I glanced down. My eyes widened into saucers. I had been going over 100 without even realizing it. "Who's going fast now?" I gave him the ugliest glare I could muster and he laughed again, the sweet melody filling my ears. We drove for hours, Edward offering advice on my driving skills until I told him to can it, which he seemed to find more amusing than reprimanding. Soon the sun began to set and I knew Charlie would be waiting for me. He wanted to spend the evening with me as he most likely suspected I would be leaving home soon. Actually I would as I had been accepted to a university in Alaska, and planned on attending. It had a record of having almost as many cloudy days as Forks.

As much as I was loathe to have Edward leave, I knew how important this dinner was to Charlie. I just hoped that my father wouldn't have to bring up the subject of his disapproval with Edward, or my plan on attending college with him. Charlie seemed to have recently acquired a knack for making peaceful evenings uncomfortable.

I dropped Edward off at home, though he could have easily run home from my house in a matter of minutes. I relished every second he was near me.

"You'll be by later?" I tried not to sound too desperate as my vampire exited the car. His eyes locked onto mine, catching my breath and surrendering my soul. Just when I thought I would faint from lack of oxygen he broke contact, and my cheeks flushed, ever embarrassed at the power he had over me.

"Of course," he winked before carefully shutting the passenger door and heading inside. I watched his graceful movements until he disappeared inside the front door before revving my engine and speeding home. I never would have thought going so fast would feel this good.

Charlie's face was aghast as I pulled into the driveway. I was impressed he didn't faint when I exited the car as gracefully as I could.

"Who did you kill for that?" He gasped, unbelieving. I smiled, unable to contain my own excitement.

"Edward got it for me," I chirped. "As a graduation present." Charlie looked at me in astonishment and I knew he was wondering how in the world Edward could afford something like that, as a gift no less.

"He won it," I quickly lied, hoping Charlie wouldn't feel bad for not getting me as exquisite of a gift. Charlie just nodded mutely, as if this were all too much for him to process. I decided to change to subject. "So what's the plan?"

"I thought we could go out," he replied, never taking his eyes off the gleaming car. I eagerly agreed, I didn't think it was possible to put me in a bad mood today. Besides, I really wasn't in the mood to cook and didn't even want to imagine what Charlie could concoct.

"May I?" I brandished the keys, opening the passenger door as an invitation. Charlie nodded and I could see the little boy excitement in his eyes. This time I drove more responsibly that I had with Edward, careful not to exceed the speed limit. Though I didn't doubt Charlie was itching to see just how fast we could go.

Dinner started off successfully and we were already halfway through desert before he brought it up. His voice was timid at first, not quite sure how to begin.

"So," he paused, allowing a spoonful of ice cream to melt in his mouth before continuing. "Are you and Edward planning on living together? For college I mean." All pleasantness immediately left my face.

"Yes," I said defensively. "What's it to you?" Charlie sighed and grasped my hand with his own. It felt awkward and I focused on not pulling away.

"Bella, I didn't plan on bringing this up tonight," his voice seemed to have found more confidence. "But I need to know."

"Yes we are," I tried to sound casual. Edward was much better at this than I was.

"I know you know I don't completely approve of him," Charlie said and I leaned back in my chair in exasperation. "But, I know that you love him and I believe he loves you too. You're old enough to make your own decision in this matter. I will no longer have a say." I blinked in surprise. These were the last words I expected to hear from my father's mouth. I had been expecting him to try and convince me Edward was no good and only destined to hurt me again. A fresh wave of respect flooded me for the man before me.

"Really?" I tested. "You are ok with us?" Charlie half smiled and I grasped his hand anew, squeezing in appreciation.

"I'm as ok as I'll ever be. All I want is for you to be happy," Charlie squeezed my hand back. "And if he happens to win another one of those cars…" I laughed and gently swiped his shoulder. This day was going better than I could have possibly hoped. Charlie glanced at his watch and quickly sprung to his feet.

"I missed kick-off!" he exclaimed and I couldn't help smiling. Same old Charlie. "Oh well, I can make it home before half time."

After depositing Charlie in front of the TV I sprung up to my room, managing to make it all the way up the stairs without incident. My face fell in disappointment at my empty room; I had been hoping Edward would be waiting for me. I couldn't wait to tell him about Charlie's approval. Well, as much approval as Charlie was possible of giving.

I sighed and sat down on my bed, smoothing out the wrinkles of my nicely made sheets. The time ticked by slowly as I waited for Edward and eventually I decided to check my email. I only had one from my mom, congratulating me on my graduation. After that I straightened up my room for a few minutes before settling into gazing out my window longingly. Not long after eleven a smile broke on my face as I spied my love and raised the window for him.

"You're late," I teased once Edward had entered.

"What, am I being monitored now?" he retorted and I was taken aback. That was definitely not the answer I had expected. The agitated look that marred his face bothered me.

"I was joking Edward," I stated. Pale fingers combed his bronze hair frantically. My brow furrowed in confusion. "What's wrong?" Edward sat heavily onto my bed. His face was immediately calm and slightly perplexed.

"I don't know," he stared ahead blankly before looking sincerely into my eyes. "I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me." I cautiously took a seat next to him, trying not to upset him further. His expression was lost in deep thought.

"Charlie approved," I said lightly, hoping this would help cheer him up. "About us, I mean." Edward blinked at looked at me as if just noticing I was there.

"What?" I could tell he was trying register what I had said. "Oh, good." There was no doubt about it, something was bothering him. This was the kind of news that he would have been excited about.

"What's up?" I asked firmly, not going to let him avoid me on this one. His eyes met mine and I knew he was just as lost as I was.

"I don't know," he repeated, shrugging his shoulder. "I guess I haven't been feeling real well." My lips pursed in anxiety. This wasn't usual. As far as I knew, vampires had a certificate of guaranteed health - as long as they fed regularly.

"Have you drunk recently?" I questioned, trying to help decipher the cause of this. Edward nodded.

"It's not that," he said slowly.

"What is it then?" I asked as soothingly as I could. "How do you feel?" He laughed thought there was no humor in his voice.

"I got in a fight with Alice," he said. "And Emmet, and Jasper, and Rosalie." I watched his eyebrows knit together as if trying to put together a complex puzzle. "They kicked me out before I could bother Carlisle and Esme."

"Oh," was all I could think to say.

"I just felt so…agitated. Like everything they said made me angry," he looked at me in concern. "Perhaps I shouldn't be here."

"No Edward," I protested, reaching for his hand. No sooner had they touched when I recoiled mine, as if it had been bitten.

"Edward!" I exclaimed in shock. "You're burning!" Edward immediately became stiff.

"What?" he asked as if he wasn't sure of what he really heard me say. I grabbed both his hands in my own, and then lifted one to his pale brow. Heat radiated onto my palm before I even made contact with the skin.

"If you were human I'd say you have a fever," I remarked in disbelief. "You're warmer than I am!" Edward stood up quickly and crossed the room to look in my mirror as if expecting to see a face other than his own looking back.

"Edward, what happened?"

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_And so it begins! ha ha ha. Anyways, please review! Good, bad, ugly - they're all welcome!_


	3. Symptoms

_Thanks to everyone who took the time to review! It really means alot and inspires me to write more. This story is flowing from me faster than any I've ever written, I'm already writing chapter 12! _

_So, I guess I should worn everyone that this story is very, very Edward-angst oriented (did I already warn this? I can't remember...). I'm really anxious to see what you all think of it, so review and let me know!_

_By the way, did anyone look up Bella's new car? It's beautiful, you should if you haven't. I would put a link to it on my profile, but I'm not computer smart enough for that kind of stuff. Oh well..._

_Anyways, I don't think I have any futher warnings...for now:) Enjoy, and review! I'm dying to know what you all think!_

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I had gotten a damp washcloth to help cool Edward off, although he claimed to feel no different than normal. Leading him back to my bed to sit I could tell he was deeply troubled by the recent events.

"Has…" I started, unsure of even where to start. "Has this ever happened before?" Perhaps there was something about vampires that I wasn't privy too. Edward shook his head, dashing my hopes.

"No, I don't know why," Edward bit his lip and shrugged his shoulders. "It's probably nothing." I nodded, believing him as much as he believed himself.

"Perhaps you should see Carlisle," I suggested. Edward immediately shook his head.

"I don't want to worry him," he brushed off my suggestion. I had the suspicion that he didn't want to return to a house with four angry vampires. I can't say I blamed him.

"Fine," I consented. "But if you're not better in the morning, we're going." I figured that would give Edward's siblings enough time to cool down. He must have thought so as well because he nodded in agreement. I joined him on my bed, leaning into him, trying not to let the warmth of his skin bother me.

A loud yawn escaped me and my eyes began to drift shut, despite my resolve to stay awake. I felt myself being lowered back onto my pillows, Edward's body curving against mine. A soft humming filled my ears and sleep was inevitable.

When I awoke the first thing I noticed was Edward's body was no longer by my side. My eyes snapped open and I bolted into a sitting position, anxiously searching the room for my love. He wasn't here. My clock glowed brightly, informing me that it was nearly eight. I sprung from my bed and quickly glanced into my closet, threw on some jeans and a t-shirt. The forecast had actually predicted it to be quite warm for the next few days, which would be a nice change after the cold and wet winter.

I tried to calm myself down as I descended the stairs to the living room. There was no reason to be worried. Edward probably had a perfectly good reason for leaving. Perhaps he had decided to go and see Carlisle.

Charlie was burning toast in the kitchen. I was surprised to see him, expecting him to have already left for fishing. He smiled at me as I entered the kitchen, raising one eyebrow at the smoking toast.

"Morning Bella," he remarked more cheerfully than I felt. "Care for some toast?" I shook my head at the black lumps on his plate.

"Is that what that is?" I joked. "No thanks. Why aren't you fishing?"

"Graduation parties," he explained, his mouth full of charcoal. "No one else could make it. I think I'll head into work for a little while, if that's ok with you?"

"No problem," I answered, not really wanting Charlie hanging around all day. "I'm just going to call Edward." He nodded slowly as I picked up the phone, not really disapproving, but not with the friendliest look on his face either. Oh well, it was better than nothing. My fingers automatically pressed the digits of the Cullen's phone number and Alice picked it up on the second ring.

"Alice," I greeted. "Is Edward there?" The string of profanities that followed his name shocked me. Perhaps I had underestimated the extent of Edward's fight with them the night before.

"No, the little rat bastard's not here. I thought he was cursing you with his presence," she finally answered my question. It was strange hearing such animosity from normally benign Alice.

"He was last night," I sighed, knowing I wasn't going to get anywhere with Alice as upset as she was. "But now he's gone." I had moved into the other room and was gazing out the window towards the forest, trying to get out of Charlie's earshot. It would not do him well to know about Edward's nightly visits.

"Well I don't know," Alice replied but I barely heard her. Something had caught my attention in the woods. Something tall and pale.

"I got to go," I cut Alice off in the middle of whatever she had been saying. "I'll call you later." I hung up and quickly put the phone back onto the receiver. Charlie was still trying to feed himself the inedible black toast.

"I'm going for a walk," I remarked quickly before heading toward to the front door.

"Ok," Charlie replied, his voice slightly startled. "Don't forget a coat!" I ignored his request and was outside before he could say anything else. Squinting, I jogged towards the forest, trying to spot what I had seen before. When I reached the edge of the forest I threw up my arms in frustration. Whatever I had seen was no longer there.

"Edward!" I shouted into the trees, but my voice reverberated dully. I took two cautious steps forward. I'm not sure how, but something told me that Edward was in here. I knew he was.

"Edward!" I called his name again and was greeted with the same eerie silence. These woods unnerved me; there was something unnatural about it, something foreboding. Perhaps it was because this was where Edward had left me oh-so long ago. I automatically associated this place with heartache.

I tried to block these thoughts from my mind as I searched. The further in I traveled the darker and more oppressing it became. A twig snapped somewhere behind me and I turned around quickly, my heart beating a million miles an hour despite my assurance it was just my overactive imagination. I had been known to scare myself silly over very little before.

As I turned back around, something caught the corner of my eye. A pale figure was sitting on the ground, leaning back against a tree. Immediately my heart leapt in relief.

"Edward!" I called, rushing toward him. Whatever joy I had felt before was quickly dissipated as I approached, slowing to a walk a few feet from his side. His knees were curled against his chest, his face covered by pale, thin hands. He reminded me of a marble statue, hard and unmoving. I knelt gently next to him and laid one hand on his unnaturally warm shoulder. At my touch he lowered his hands and turned his face towards mine. His expression was lost and confused.

"Bella?" he asked, as if surprised to see me. "You're alive." I was baffled. What in the world was going on?

"Of course I'm alive," I comforted, taking his hands in mine. Edward leaned his head back against the tree, looking to the ceiling of leaves above.

"I thought," he began, swallowing hard. "I saw you…" His eyes closed as if it were too horrible to imagine. "You were dead." I leaned against him, trying to assure him of my existence.

"I'm right here Edward," I soothed. "Nothing happened to me." His face dropped with relief and I leaned in to press my lips to his but had to pull away before I was sure my skin would sizzle off from the heat emanating from Edward.

"Let's get you to Carlisle," I stated, my tone leaving no room for questions. Edward simply nodded and rose to his feet, leaning heavily against the tree, which worried me slightly. His eyes closed tightly for a second before he opened them and shook his head.

"What's wrong?" My voice was filled with worry. Something was definitely not right.

"Nothing," Edward tried to assure me. "Just a little dizzy." My brow furrowed. I had never heard of vampires getting dizzy. By his reluctance to let go of the tree I knew Edward didn't trust himself to walk on his own. Immediately I glued myself to his side, placing his arm over my shoulder and wrapping my own around his waist. Edward didn't protest, which was perhaps what worried me the most. I don't know if I'd ever seen him except help willingly before, preferring to do everything himself.

Slowly we made our way out of the forest, Edward leaning heavily against me the whole way. By the way he kept gazing at my face I guessed he was verifying that I was in fact alive. We walked in silence and I racked my brain for any possible explanation I could conjure. His symptoms were similar to an extreme fever, with a high temperature, agitation, delirious hallucinations, and weakness. But that was impossible. Vampires don't just simply get sick like humans. Something was wrong.

We reached the edge of the forest and I stopped in dismay. The sky was cloudless and everything was drenched in sunlight. I couldn't risk bringing Edward into the open with the chance that someone would see and expose him for something other than human. I carefully steered toward a tree draped in shade that Edward could support himself with.

"Edward," I instructed. "I need you to wait here, I'm going to go get the car." Edward nodded mutely, like a small child. Unwillingly I left his side and turned to sprint to my car. Edward's angelic voice briefly stopped me.

"Bella," he sounded worried. "Come back." Tears sprang to my eyes and I tried to fight them back.

"I'll be right back," I assured. "I promise." Without another word I ran as fast as I could, not stopping until I reached the front door. I was slightly relieved to see Charlie's cruiser gone; I didn't want to have to explain my unusual haste. Not bothering to shut the door behind me, I dashed up the stairs to my room, grabbed the keys off my dresser, and sprinted back down to my car, managing to fall only once.

Revving the engine to life I screeched from the driveway and parked as close to the forest as I possibly could. We would still have to cross a couple feet of sunlight and I prayed no one would see. With impressive speed, for me at least, I was by Edward's side again, as if I had never left. An expression of utmost confusion was plastered to his face and I wondered what could be wrong now.

"Bella, what happened?" he asked examining my worried face.

"You were in the woods," I replied cautiously. Edward glanced back at the trees in wonder. "Don't you remember?" He shook his head in denial. I desperately wished Carlisle were here.

"Where are we going?' he asked, motioning toward the car.

"I'm taking you to Carlisle," I stated, stepping forward so he could lean on me.

"I'm fine," he insisted, refusing my help. I sighed. This was more like the Edward I knew.

"No you're not!" I insisted as he shrugged me off and left the support of the tree. He made it barely three steps before his knees began to buckle. I dove to his side before he could hit the ground and wrapped my arms around his waist. His face was bewildered as he clung to me silently, probably astonished that I was right.

We reached the edge of the shade and I looked around, eyeing the empty street nervously.

"Is anyone nearby?" I questioned Edward, his face already serious with concentration. He pursed his lips and slowly shook his head.

"I don't hear anyone on the street, just someone wondering where they put their shampoo," he grinned at me. "We're clear." Trusting our powers of observation we plunged into the sunlight. Immediately I felt as if I were supporting the sun; Edward's skin shown brilliantly in the light, his luminescence sending millions of glittering sparkles in a ring around us. No sooner had we reached the car and opened the passenger door when a truck came speeding down the road beside us. I forcefully shoved Edward into the car and slammed the door shut, desperately hoping the driver hadn't spotted anything unusual. My heart fell as the truck suddenly swerved to the side of the road and the engine sputtered to a stop. I leaned against the side of my car casually, hoping they would dismiss anything unusual they had seen as a figment of their imagination.

I tried to keep my anxiousness in check as the driver's door opened and Mike Newton leaped from the truck. Ugh, the last person I wanted to see at the moment. His eyes were wide with astonishment. Crap, I thought, he must've seen.

"Woah Bella," he exclaimed approaching me slowly. "Is that your car?" I blinked in surprise.

"What? Oh, yeah," I forced my voice to sound casual and I tried to think of a way I could remove myself from the obvious conversation that would follow.

"When did you get it?" Mike's voice was dripping with jealousy.

"Uh, yesterday." Had it really only been that long ago? It seemed like ages. "Graduation present." Mike's face turned slightly dark.

"Let me guess," he wrinkled his brow in pretend thought. "Cullen." I wondered if he would ever get over my attraction to Edward rather than himself. Most likely not.

"Bingo," I replied and made my way over to the driver's side. "And you know what, I really have to be…"

"What's wrong with him?" Mike cut me off, motioning towards Edward in the passenger seat. I glanced into the car, Edward was slumped over in his seat, unmoving. I quickly yanked open my door.

"I've gotta go," I quickly dismissed Mike. Out of my peripheral vision I saw him shrug his shoulders and make his way back towards his own truck. I reached across the seat to grab Edward's shoulders, alarmed at the intense heat radiating from his body. My other hand pressed against his forehead, lifting it off his chest.

"Edward!" I cried. "Wake up!"

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_Ooo, cliffie! If I get enough reviews I might update tomorrow, otherwise I'll see you all on Thursday!_


	4. Confusion

_I'm so so so so so sorry I couldn't update yesterday! I had to go to the zoo with my dad's girlfriend and watch a bunch of seven year olds. I thought I would be home after the zoo, but I didn't end up getting home until 11:00 and I was exhausted. So, that's my wonderful excuse. Lions and tigers and bears, oh my!_

_Anyways, thanks to all my wonderful reviewers! Keep it up, I want to get over 100 for this story! Tell your friends..._

_Enjoy!_

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Edward gazed ahead blankly, having awoken shortly after I had started the car. His head rested in his hands as I sped through town, trying to get to Carlisle as fast as possible. He looked up only when we entered the long, grassy driveway, saying nothing, ignoring my questions and anxious glances. 

Soon the house came into sight; I don't think I'd ever been more thankful to see that building in my life. Esme was out front, kneeling in her beautiful garden, smudged head to toe in dirt. She smiled as I pulled in, waving enthusiastically. Dashing from the car around towards the passenger seat I became aware of her presence behind me, her cheery greetings replaced by a worried frown.

I pulled open the door, bending down to wrap Edward's arm around my neck, carefully trying to hoist him from the car. Esme was immediately on the opposite side, supporting Edward's weight more easily than I could.

"What happened?" Her velvet voice was laced with concern as we helped Edward up the stairs to the front door.

"I don't know," I replied as Esme took all of Edward's weight so I could hold open the entryway. "He just got…sick." I didn't know any other way to describe it.

A loud shriek erupted through the room and Alice was by our side before I could blink.

"Go get Carlisle," Esme instructed firmly and Alice nodded, disappearing from sight. We had barely gotten Edward to the couch when Carlisle appeared, followed by Alice and Jasper. Edward had lapsed into unconsciousness again and his still body reminded me chillingly of a recent death. I had to close my eyes and try and clear the thought from my mind. A comforting arm wound around me and I glanced gratefully at Alice, though the worry never left my eyes.

Carlisle had rested a hand on Edward's forehead, wincing at the odd heat radiating from the skin and turned to look towards me.

"Bella," his voice had assumed his trained professional tone. "I need you to tell me everything that happened."

"I don't know what happened," I repeated what I had said to Esme. "He came over last night, and he felt hot, but he insisted everything was alright." My voice sounded slightly hysterical and I was trying desperately not to break down. It wouldn't help Edward any to start crying. "When I woke up he was gone and I found him in the woods. He just keeps getting worse! What's wrong with him?"

Carlisle shook his head. "I don't know."

"I thought vampires couldn't get sick!" I exclaimed, tears starting to leak down my cheeks. Carlisle's seeming loss at the situation scared me. I had been sure that everything would be all right once we had gotten to him. It had to be.

"We can't," Alice replied, her flat voice almost unrecognizable. My throat constricted and I was finding it strangely hard to breath. I hoped I wasn't about to hyperventilate.

"Deep breaths Bella," Jasper instructed, sensing my distress. His hand rested lightly on my shoulder and I began to feel slightly more relaxed. At least until Edward's eyes blinked open. He shot into a sitting position and glared darkly at Alice and Jasper.

"What have you done to her?" he shouted, rising from the couch and attempting to fling the vampires from my side. "How could you do this?"

"Edward, stop!" I screamed, grabbing his arms to sooth him. The next thing I knew I had been flung to the ground with amazing force and Carlisle and Esme were restraining Edward from attacking Alice, which wasn't too hard in his weakened condition. Jasper was by my side, helping me up, my head spinning slightly. Edward was shouting an impressive list of profanities at his sister, who was crying some form of denial back at him.

"Get her out," Carlisle instructed to Jasper, who dragged my struggling body from the room. I couldn't bear to be taken away from my love. Not when he was in such a state.

"Calm down Bella!" Jasper's voice was firm and I ceased to fight against him, reason finally penetrating my skull. Although I trusted Jasper completely, I knew he had the weakest resolve of them all and I didn't want to tempt him, however accidentally. I could tell he was thinking along the same lines and he sighed gratefully. Even outside I could hear the shouting from inside, although I couldn't quite make out what they were saying.

Suddenly my legs felt shaky and I lowered myself onto the front steps, desperately trying not to cry in front of Jasper. I knew it was silly, but I really didn't want to show him my weakness. Fiercely I wished I had the control and cool-headedness that the others had. I sniffed, embarrassed, as Jasper took a seat beside me. I had never appreciated his quiet nature more than now. We could sit, unspeaking, and not have the awkward feeling that always seems to arise in these sorts of situations.

"Where are Rosalie and Emmett?" I asked quietly after several minutes of silence. The arguing was still quite apparent through the partially opened door.

"They went hunting," Jasper replied, his face examining mine carefully, as if I were the one to be worried about, not Edward. I gave a half-smile, trying to assure him I was ok. Suddenly Alice's head popped out through the doorway.

"Bella, could you come in?" She asked as sweetly as she could, although it was obvious she was quite upset. "I think he needs to see you."

I sprung to my feet without toppling over and Alice held the door open for me as I entered. Edward was seated on the couch, looking exhausted, the rings below his eyes unusually dark. His face lit up as I stumbled to his side, eyes examining me up and down as if to make sure all my limbs were still attached.

"Edward, I'm ok," I tried to assure, for the second time that day. "Nothing happened." His hands reached to my face, stroking my cheeks gently before running down my neck to my shoulders and then dropping limply to his sides. More shame than I had ever seen filled his eyes and his gaze dropped to the floor sullenly.

"He thought we had changed you," Alice explained, approaching with caution. Edward made no reaction to her voice. I gazed at him in wonder, and then looked towards Carlisle's searching face. He wore the same worry that all of us adorned, but there was something else as well, something underneath that I couldn't quite place. He rose without a word and swiftly disappeared up the stairs to his study. Esme squeezed Edward's hand tightly before following her husband. I remained by my love's side, unsure of what to say or do.

Sun streamed through the windows, brightening the room and causing the vampires' skin to faintly glimmer, as if they were lightly dusted with golden glitter. Alice and Jasper were seated on the floor, whispering too quiet for me to make out. Time seemed to have slowed down as I anxiously awaited Carlisle's return. Every second I waited seemed to stretch for hours. I rubbed Edward's back soothingly, though he had remained as still as a marble statue since he had seen me. Only his open eyes and quiet breaths gave any indication that he was still awake.

A sharp gasp averted my attention towards Alice; her eyes were wide and unfocused, she gripped Jasper tightly. Her mouth was moving frantically though no words could be heard. Jasper rubbed her shoulders reassuringly and slowly her eyes grasped what she was seeing around her.

"Edward," she whispered, so quiet I wasn't even sure I had heard her. Then, despite Jasper's questions about what she had seen, she jumped to her feet and bounded up the stairs to Carlisle's study. Jasper gazed at me apologetically before following after Alice. I sat with Edward, feeling strangely alone.

Suddenly Edward's back began to straighten and his head turned towards my face, his own face filled with sorrow and something else. Regret? I just knew that I didn't like it. It reminded me too much of when he left. My chest throbbed painfully at the thought and I tried to push it from my mind.

"I know what Alice saw," Edward remarked softly. I bit my lips nervously, not liking where this conversation was bound to lead.

"You're going to be ok," I think I was assuring myself as much as him. "Carlisle will know what to do." Edward's face didn't change at my words. He glanced around the room, as if noticing where he was for the first time.

"Bella," his voice was dark. I couldn't breathe. "No matter what happens…" I couldn't take this anymore.

"No!" I broke in. "Nothing is going to happen! You're going to be fine!"

Edward's mouth raised in a compassionate smile. His hand tangled in my hair and he pressed his lips to mine. The passion and urgency with which he kissed me was frightening, as if he had to make up for a lifetime of lost kisses. Eventually the temptation proved too much and he broke away. I looked down, unable to meet the smoldering ocher eyes. There was no reason to be thinking of losing him; nothing had occurred that should make me believe that. I was sure there had to be some simple way of righting everything.

The door flew open and an extremely agitated Rosalie walked through the door followed by lumbering Emmett.

"…know why you're dragging me back to that low-life, venom-tongued, squelching slug of a brother…" Rosalie's complaints towards Emmett faded as she took in both of our pitiful conditions; Edward's flushed features and my obviously tear-dried cheeks. Emmett poked her from behind.

"I told you I had a bad feeling," Emmett whispered in a voice not meant for our ears. Rosalie turned and glared at him, most likely upset at being proven wrong.

"What's going on?" she directed the question towards me, her eyes narrowing to catlike slits. I had no chance to answer as Carlisle had made his way down the stairs, followed by the rest of the family. He barely even seemed to register Rosalie and Emmett's presence before speaking with obvious haste.

"We need to go to Italy."


	5. 115

_Hola! Happy Father's Day (just in case there are any fathers out there...) I don't know if this is a good day to update, but I'm trying to stick to my original plan of every other day, so that no one gets disappointed:) I have to thank everyone for the great review turnout! Seriously, nothing makes it more worth it than hearing from you. That's why I do this. _

_Anyways, the story is finished! I'm so excited to hear what everyone thinks as it progresses. I don't think I have to put any warnings out, unless to maybe remind you to restock your kleenex supply. _

_Oh, on a side note, I have a great book/movie recommendation. If you haven't you should definitely read Anne Rice's Interview with the Vampire. It is a slightly darker take on vampirism, but wonderful none-the-less. I loved it and am really excited to read the rest of her vampire series. The movie was also really good, if you don't want to take the time to read it. It was actually one of the few movies that I liked the ending better than the book's ending. Plus, Antonio Banderas is a vampire. Enough said:) Anyways, that's my recomendation for the day!_

_Enjoy!_

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"No!" Edward shouted, causing everyone to jump in surprise. Obviously no one really expected any sort of reaction out of him at all. "We're not going."

Edward's face was hard with surprising anger. I tried to calm him by placing a hand on his shoulder, but he jerked away as soon as I made contact. My cheeks flushed and I folded both my hands neatly in my lap, trying not to feel hurt.

"What's going on?" Rosalie questioned in confusion. "What about Italy?" Nobody answered her as Carlisle approached Edward, kneeling in front of him, his face filled with too many emotions to decipher.

"Edward," he said slowly and I knew no good news was coming. "You've been infected with a virus. This is beyond my skill to heal; our only hope is to get you to Italy as quickly as possible. Some old friends of mine may still remember the cure." Edward's resolve remained cold as steel.

"No," he simply repeated. Esme stepped forward a few paces.

"Please," her pleading voice could've convinced me to bathe myself in battery acid. "It's the only way." Edward's eyes flickered briefly to my face. Suddenly I knew where this was going and I held my breath for his next words.

"I'll only go if Bella stays," his voice was firm.

"No!" My voice cracked in panic. "I'm going with."

"It's too dangerous for you," Edward gazed solely on my face. "They know who you are. They want you."

"I don't care!" I cried. "I'm not going to leave you."

"Bella…" Edward's voice warned in a no-nonsense tone before Rosalie butted in.

"Oh for goodness sakes Edward, let her go." Edward's eyes threw daggers in her direction. "She's going to find a way, whether you wish her to or not."

"It's true," Alice confirmed. "She's coming."

Edward's face fell and he resumed his statue-like demeanor, staring blankly at the floor. I let my hand fall lightly by his leg, as if by accident, and was happy when he didn't pull away, as before.

"Alice," Carlisle's voice penetrated the sudden silence. "Can you see when the next flight out is?" Alice's closed her eyes in concentration only briefly.

"There's a departure at seven," she informed. "And one at ten."

"Excellent," Carlisle exclaimed. "Rosalie, I need you to call and get tickets on whichever flight is available." Rosalie nodded and swiftly exited to the kitchen, obedient albeit a bit confused. The situation wasn't even completely clear to me. It was all too unbelievable to be real, like a bad dream I expected to awake from any second. Except with each passing moment the situation became all the more painfully real.

It wasn't long until Rosalie appeared, smiling successfully.

"They weren't too happy about the short notice, but I managed to…persuade…them to get us on the seven o'clock," she chimed. It amazed me how she could sound so cheery at a time like this, but then again she was Rosalie. My hand twitched as the muscles in Edward's leg tightened and I glanced at him worriedly. He was biting his lips, his eyes flickering towards me but glancing away as he realized I was looking at him. I knew he wasn't happy with me coming but I didn't care. I wasn't going to sit here helplessly.

"Bella," Carlisle's voice cut through my thoughts. "Do you have a passport?" Edward twitched in what I could only assume was anger as I nodded.

"I need you to get it," he instructed. "And anything else you'll need." I rose to my feet, gazing at Edward regretfully, unwilling to leave his side.

"We won't go anywhere until you get back," Carlisle comforted. Edward remained stiff as stone. I knew he wasn't being himself, but the newly healed hole in my chest ripped open ever so slightly at my love's refusal to acknowledge me. Unable to stand his stony demeanor any longer, I turned and fled the room.

I kept my mind as blank as I could as I drove home. I couldn't afford to explore any negative possibilities. In fact, I cleared my mind so effectively that I couldn't even think of anything else I needed besides my passport, so I tarried no longer than necessary.

I didn't realize how fast I must've been going until the wailing sound of a siren penetrates through my windows. Groaning in frustration, I pulled over, trying to keep my emotions in check. I let my head fall against the steering wheel as I glanced in the review mirror and saw who was approaching the car. Unwillingly I rolled down my window as Charlie looked in at me in astonishment. I couldn't even raise the energy to turn my face towards his.

"Bella," his voice was shocked. "Do you know how fast you were going?" I shook my head in pretend ignorance. I knew exactly how fast I had been going, but I wasn't about to admit that to my father.

"115!" Charlie sounded slightly frantic. "You were going 115 Bella!" Finally I straightened my back and gazed into the face I had known my whole life. A face I had never really known until recently.

"Dad," I resisted the urge to call him by this real name. "I'm going to Italy."

"What?" He shook his head slightly, as if unsure of what I really said.

"Edward is sick," I said with as much sincerity as I could muster. "We have to take him to someone Carlisle knows in Italy."

"Sick?" Charlie was starting to sound like a parrot. His face had softened slightly in my obvious distress. "Bella, you can't go to Italy."

"I'm going," my voice was slightly hysterical and I tried to calm down. "I'm going whether you want me to or not, but I would rather leave with your understanding." Charlie ran his hands through his hair, looking at me as if I were something foreign to him. He sighed heavily.

"I sure hope you know what you're doing," Charlie's voice was filled only with fatherly concern. "That Edward is truly worth all this." I smiled at him reassuringly.

"He is," I leaned out the window and gave my father a quick kiss on the cheek. He looked quite taken aback. "I love him." Charlie shrugged his shoulders helplessly.

"Send me a postcard," he winked at me before turning and heading back towards his cruiser. I couldn't help but chuckle slightly as I pulled back onto the road and, careful to stay under the speed limit, made my way back to the Cullens.

When I arrived Rosalie and Emmett were standing outside, both looking slightly agitated. Rosalie rolled her eyes as I exited the car and I tried to ignore her as I made my way past them to the front door.

"I don't know if I'd go in there," Rosalie's voice was offhand, almost bored. "It's pretty steamy." I paid no attention to her warning and pulled the door open just enough to slip inside. Edward was still on the couch, though he had a livid expression on his face. Carlisle was standing to the side, obviously frustrated.

"No," Edward was saying fiercely. "I refuse!" Carlisle threw his hands in the air.

"Edward, we can't very well carry you on the plane," Carlisle exclaimed, exasperated. Neither of them gave any acknowledgment to my presence. "They would know something was wrong. We can't afford to have you being checked by a doctor, you know that."

"I don't care," Edward's voice dropped. "It's pointless anyways." My mouth dropped open and Carlisle gazed at his adoptive son sadly.

"It's not pointless," Carlisle sounded sincere. "Not if we hurry."

"Look Carlisle," Edward was using a voice I had never heard him use with any of his family members before. It was almost vicious. "I don't pretend to know what's wrong with me. But I know what Alice saw. I know I'm going to die." I suddenly felt faint and had to lean against a chair to steady myself. My voice seemed to be stuck in my throat.

"Alice isn't always right," I managed to squeak out. "She saw my death and I'm still here." Edward and Carlisle looked to me for the first time.

"She isn't always wrong either," the calmness of Edward's voice scared me. He leaned back against the couch, closing his eyes, as if fighting off a great fatigue. Why did Edward always have to assume the worst in all situations? It was uncanny.

"Fine," Carlisle gave in before opening the front door to exit. "Have it your way." Edward's lips turned up into a slight smile though his eyes remained shut. Carlisle forcefully shut the door behind him and I cautiously made my way to Edward's side. I wanted to be as near to him as I possibly could until this all got straightened out.

"You sure have a knack for making people upset at you," I said lightly, taking a seat on the couch. Edward's eyes blinked open and he gazed at me passionately.

"Bella, promise me you won't do anything stupid in Italy," Edward said seriously. I found myself thinking in a very Edward-like manner.

"Only if you promise to take Carlisle's advice from now on," I bargained. The corners of Edward's lips twitched in amusement.

"Ugh," Edward exclaimed. "You kill me." I gave a small bow.

"I learn from the best," I teased before Alice stuck her head in the door beckoning us out to the car. Edward muttered in frustration at his own legs as I helped him off the couch. He leaned on me heavily as I guided him out the door and across the lawn. I noticed he never took his eyes off the ground in front him, as if too ashamed at his own weakness to look at the others. We were taking two of the Cullen's cars, deciding it probably wouldn't be a good idea to leave mine in a parking lot for an extended period of time.

I had never been too big on religion, but as Carlisle helped me to lower Edward into the back of one of the cars I prayed silently to whoever happened to be listening. I prayed for all of us, that this trip would prove successful. But mostly, I prayed for Edward.

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_So, that's not too bad of a cliffhanger...I don't think at least..._


	6. A history

_Ya! An early update, at special request. So, I hope some more questions are answered in this chapter. Just to clarify, my entire little 'history' of vampires is completely made up by me, and is in no way connected to anything Stephenie Meyer has said or written. I just needed to explain certain things and this way worked._

_Also, Bella's fear of heights is made up by me as well, so don't yell at me for being inconsistant with the book. I just thought it fit well in the story and was really fun to write. _

_Anyways, I'm ecstatic about all the wonderful reviews I've gotten! Keep 'em coming! Enjoy! (And no matter how many times you ask I'm not going to tell you if Edward dies...ha ha...)_

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Esme was driving; I sat next to her comforting presence gazing out the window blankly. My mind was filled to the brim with questions and I wasn't sure how long I could suppress them. Certainly not as long as it would take us to get to the Port Angeles airport.

"It's ok Bella," Carlisle said understandingly. "You can ask." I realized I had been drumming on the window nervously with my fingers. I gently rested them in my lap before shifting in my seat to get a better view of the back. Edward was staring out the window in much the same position that I had previously been.

"How is it possible?" I asked after debating which question to begin with. "How can a virus affect vampires?"

"Are you open to a little history?" Carlisle questioned and I nodded. Edward remained still, but I knew he was listening as intently as I was. "It was many centuries ago, before I was even born. Vampires used to be much more abundant and vicious, attacking not only at night but during the day. They worked stealthily, usually on small villages, slowly picking everyone off until no one was left. Occasionally someone managed to escape their massacre and would spread stories of our kind. Most scorned them and attributed these tales to merely delusions from the trauma they had suffered, but a few believed. Eventually the numbers of the believers accumulated and they set a trap in a village whose residents had slowly been disappearing. They caught the vampire responsible and inflicted him with great pain, trying to force him to reveal the secret to our destruction.

"The vampire bargained with the humans, his freedom in exchange for a weapon. This vampire, whose name has been lost in the decay of time, was not stupid. In fact, he was probably one of the most intelligent of us that had ever lived. But he was evil as well. For years he had been constructing this weapon, a biological weapon designed to live in vampire venom. He had intended it to be a more effective way of killing humans; he could drain their blood, drinking until he had his fill, yet even sucked dry the humans would still be transformed into vampires. He intended to make vampires the dominant species of the earth, breeding humans for food like cattle.

"However, the virus was still in the early stages of development and had effectively killed every unfortunate vampire he had tested it on. He traded this virus to the humans for his freedom, never intending to let them have it long enough to use it. Unfortunately for him, he hadn't expected the humans to go back on their word. They failed to follow their end of the bargain, and killed the vampire with his own poison, as a test of its claimed power. Then they unleashed it into the vampire community.

"Hundreds of vampires were wiped out by this synthetic plague before its existence became widely known. I'm sure you can guess who acted first to stop this genocide."

"The Volturi," I whispered, entranced by Carlisle's story, who nodded grimly.

"Exactly," he continued. "The Volturi managed to contain the virus, isolating it, studying it. It was several years before they were able to concoct an antidote however and by that time the vampire community had suffered great losses. I was turned towards the end of this struggle, and in my associations with the Volturi I was enlightened to this information, and to their assurances that there was only one specimen of the virus left, kept alive in safe keeping in case of any future emergencies. Much like how humans have kept only a few specimens of the smallpox virus alive, locked away where no one can gain access to them."

I nodded, my brain digesting everything Carlisle had just told me. There was something that didn't seem to quite fit.

"If the Volturi had the only sample, than how did Edward get infected?" I asked. Carlisle pursed his lips.

"That's exactly what has been puzzling me," Carlisle looked thoughtful. "Vampires do not have a census or any way to keep track of our numbers, as you humans have, and it is possible that not every infected vampire was taken care of. My best guess is that when Edward was tracking Victoria into South America he somehow stumbled on the incubating virus. Though how, I cannot imagine."

Edward looked away from the window for the first time. I could tell this information had affected him; his face suddenly looked drawn and weary. As if he had already answered the knock on death's door.

"Have I infected everyone then?" he was trying extremely hard to keep his voice calm. Carlisle shook his head, his brow furrowed.

"I'm afraid I am not very well versed on this subject, other than its history. If I remember correctly it more of a contact virus, being spread through more through touch than through the air. I know that it has quite a long incubation period, resting unknown in the body for several months before it begins to spread. I also know that it is harmless to humans," he answered what I am sure was Edward's next unspoken question. I noticed Edward had stiffened noticeably, as if afraid of his own body. I was willing to bet my life he was thinking of everyone who had touched him since his symptoms had become noticeable.

"And the Volturi will have the antidote," I stated more than asked. "They will be able to cure him."

"That's what I'm hoping," Carlisle replied, his expression sad as he glanced at Edward who had resumed his absent gaze out the window. I turned back to front, lost in thought. Esme's hand reached across and gently squeezed my leg comfortingly and I turned to her gratefully.

"Don't worry," she consoled. "We will do everything in our power to save him."

The rest of the drive to Port Angeles was silent, everyone consumed with their thoughts. After several long minutes we pulled into the extended stay parking garage, the other car pulling in shortly behind us. We had made considerably good time and thankfully didn't have to rush to make our flight. I wasn't sure how fast we could go with Edward and I definitely didn't want him feeling any more burdening than he already did. I was at Edward's door impressively fast, though I was no rival to any of the vampire's speed, and gently helped him from the car. Emmett had approached us, meaning to help me, but Edward jerked away before he could lay a hand on him.

"Don't touch me," Edward warned harshly and Emmett looked slightly taken aback. Edward softened his gaze slightly. "Please Emmett." Emmett just nodded and returned to his wife's side. Carlisle had managed to hook Edward's arm over his shoulders while he had been preoccupied with Emmett. Edward tried to jerk away, but Carlisle held him firmly.

"If it is spread through touch I've already been infected," Carlisle said in a don't-even-begin-to-argue-with-me voice. "Let me help you." Edward looked slightly irritated but ceased trying to pull away. I was quietly thankful of Carlisle. I would have gladly supported Edward the whole way, but although Edward wasn't necessarily heavy, he was no lightweight either, and I was definitely not one of the strongest people I knew.

I kept my hand on his back which I hoped would help calm him as we made our way into the airport. Alice was consulting quietly with Carlisle; no doubt she had had another vision on our way here. I desperately wished I had the vampire's acute hearing. Carlisle's stony expression and occasional nod gave no clues to what Alice had seen.

Soon we entered the small, almost empty airport. The few travelers, who were most likely departing than arriving, stopped in their tracks as we passed, staring at us in awe. I couldn't blame them, the grace and beauty all of my companions possessed was enough to intimidate anyone. I felt strangely out of place.

Rosalie seemed to enjoy the attention and smiled seductively at every male whose mouth dropped as she passed, at least until Emmett poked her in the back, obviously not enjoying her flirting as much as she was, glaring at anyone whose gaze lingered on her a second too long.

I almost felt sorry for the kid behind the checking counter; he looked to be in his late twenties, obviously quite new at the job. Carlisle transferred Edward's weight to my shoulder as he addressed the dumbfounded boy behind the counter. Very professionally he pulled his ID from his pocket and gave it to the boy for examination.

"I'm doctor Carlisle Cullen, I believe my associate called in earlier to make us special reservations on the seven o'clock flight," Carlisle explained in a voice I don't think I could have even made myself argue with.

"My team and I," Carlisle motioned to Rosalie, Emmett, and Esme "are transporting a non-infectious patient to a special treatment facility in Italy. We were assured of your cooperation." The boy, whose nametag read Ethan, punched some keys into the computer and swallowed several times before speaking.

"Non-infectious?" He recited, most likely as he had been trained. Carlisle nodded.

"Cancer."

"Who are the rest?" Ethan asked, trying to sound as official as possible.

"Just the patient's fiancé and immediate family," Carlisle replied without hesitation. I felt an odd glow in my stomach at being called Edward's fiancé. I kind of liked it.

Ethan glanced us over before requesting our passports. I crossed my fingers, desperately hoping he wouldn't call Carlisle's bluff. To my relief everything checked out and he proceeded to ask his usual string of questions, whether we had any lighters, knives, or liquids on us. After we had received our tickets and made our way through the metal detectors I glanced back at Ethan, smiling slightly as I saw him wipe his brow and exhale deeply, as if surviving and important job interview. I knew I would probably be doing the same if I had been on the receiving end of Carlisle's impressive act.

Carlisle winked at me once we had safely passed through security and I smiled back. We were held up as Rosalie unsurprisingly set off the detectors and had to wanded down before they attributed it to the load of jewelry she happened to be wearing. Once Rosalie was cleared we were greeted by a kindly faced older woman in an official looking airport uniform. Having not flown very much in my life, everything about the airport seemed to impress me. She addressed Carlisle, who was very obviously the superior of our group.

"We have public use wheelchairs that your patient is welcome to use," she suggested kindly and Carlisle smiled at her warmly. Her cheeks flushed.

"Thank you very much," he accepted, ignoring Edward's death glare. Suddenly I knew what they had been arguing about previously when I had walked in on their conversation in the living room. She disappeared briefly into a restricted room and returned with a dark blue wheelchair, the letters PORT ANGELES AIRPORT stenciled in the back. Edward's body had stiffened to stone and Carlisle practically had to force him into the chair. Edward's eyes shot fire at us, as if daring us to say anything. Rosalie had to turn away to hide her smirk. The airport attendant looked pleased with herself as she directed us towards our terminal.

Edward did look strangely ill, sitting tensely in the chair. The circles under his eyes were a dark purple and his face was even paler than normal, which previously I would have thought impossible. I wanted nothing more than to snuggle in beside him, wrapping his arms about my waist, his angelic voice whispering in my ear. I wanted to hold him, to kiss him, to tell him I loved him…but that would have to wait. Right now we had to hurry.

I took the wheels, per se, of Edward's chair and followed Carlisle through the airport. We only had to wait about thirty minutes before they started boarding. The nice thing about being with a patient in a wheelchair was we got to board first and they upgraded us to first class. The plane was mostly empty anyway, and they claimed it to be no problem. I'm sure Rosalie's sultry smiles at the pilots were an encouraging factor as well.

"All right!" Emmett exclaimed as he flung himself onto an oversized seat, pulling his wife on top of him. She laughed and playfully swiped at him. The attendants were staring with their mouths open, at the beautiful couple. I suppose I had gotten more used to the vampire's surreal appearance than I had realized.

"Knock it off," Alice complained, flopping into the row behind them. Jasper joined her and I noticed his own hand slipping into places meant unseen. Carlisle and I helped Edward into a chair in the front row, the flight attendants immediately offering us snacks and refreshments. I requested a coke and a bagel, everyone else politely refusing. I ravenously devoured the bagel, realizing I hadn't eaten anything yet that day.

Business class began to board then, everyone gazing at us jealously in our apparent luxury. After everyone had been loaded onto the plane and the motors had finished their starting up groans and whirs, which made me jump every time, much to Edward's amusement, we began to coast the down runway. My knuckles were white on my armrests as we gained speed and I closed my eyes, expecting to hear the loud crash of an explosion any second. I heard Edward chuckling beside me.

"Bella, you can open your eyes," he whispered in my ear. I cautiously peeked one open, hoping not to see flames licking the sealing, or the back half of the plane to suddenly disconnect. "We're in the air." I opened my other eye and hesitantly glanced out the window, before snapping my head back around to Edward. I had been hoping to avoid flying with him for some time, at least until I could come to terms with certain…memories. The last time I had flown on a plane was when Alice and I were rushing to stop Edward from committing suicide. Added on top was my irrational fear of heights.

"Don't tell me you're afraid of heights," Edward was smiling at my curiously. I swallowed hard and avoided his probing eyes.

"Maybe," I replied, making my voice sound as offhand as possible. Edward laughed. I screwed my face up in an offended manner.

"What's so funny?" I asked him, eager for any distraction from our current situation.

"You are," he responded, still smiling. I pointed toward myself in feigned surprise.

"What? Lots of people are afraid of heights," I said casually, lowering my voice to a whisper. "It's normal for us humans." Edward gripped my hand reassuringly.

"Don't worry," his voice was delicious in my ear, his breath mouthwateringly sweet. "I won't leave you." I think all control over my mind left me and I felt myself being drawn in for a kiss. Our lips had barely touched when I childish squeals came from the other side of the plane and I felt a lumpy airplane pillow connect with my head. I raised my head, glaring at an extremely guilty looking Alice.

"Get a room," she squirmed and I threw the pillow back at her as hard as I could, sticking my tongue out at her like a third grader. Then I settled back into my seat, folding my arms and preparing myself for my second ever long flight to Italy.

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_Tell me what you think!!! I'm dying to know! See you again Wednesday!_


	7. The Verdict

_Aha! And now the chapter you've all been waiting for...well, almost...the much anticipated prologue chapter shall follow the next chapter. I know this one is a bit shorter, but I am kind of fond of it. I hope you are too! _

_Nothing really to say before this one, except that I really appreciate feedback. In case anyone's interested, I already have a sequel brewing in my mind, so put me on your author alert, even though this story isn't even half-way over. Oh yes, there is much more to come. ha ha ha..._

_Enjoy!_

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I felt someone shaking me and I blinked my eyes open blearily. Carlisle was kneeling in front of me, rousing me from my sleep. I hadn't even realized I had fallen asleep; I had been determined to stay awake in case Edward needed me for any reason. My eyes flickered towards him worriedly. His eyes were closed and his head was tilted to one side, his chest rising and falling slowly as if in deep sleep. I started slightly but Carlisle put a hand comfortingly on my arm.

"He's alright," Carlisle said softly and I relaxed slightly. It was odd to see Edward sleep; it made him seem almost…human. "We're almost there, wake him up once we've landed. He needs the rest." I nodded my head, rubbing my eyes groggily as Carlisle left. I looked around the cabin. Alice and Jasper were watching the in-flight movie with rather blank expressions on their faces. I doubted they were paying much attention to it. Emmett and Rosalie were playfully wrestling; at least that's what I assumed they were doing, although part of me was convinced I didn't truly want to know. Esme was engrossed in a book, looking up as Carlisle returned to the seat next to her, whispering in her ear. She nodded gravely.

I sighed and stared out the window. We were surrounded by dark clouds as we descended and I could tell it was raining underneath us. Edward stirred slightly but didn't awake. Something about the serenity of his face while he slept made my heart ache. I desperately wanted to stroke his smooth, marble-like cheeks, but feared disturbing him in his much needed peace.

The pilot's voice crackled onto the overhead, warning of some slight turbulence. I gripped my hands tightly together, my palms starting to sweat, wishing we could just land as quickly as possible. The plane began to shake and I closed my eyes, praying for my life. Eventually the tremors ceased and I forced myself to look out the window. The lights of the town twinkled through the rain, reminding me of millions of tiny fireflies. I turned my head towards Edward, who was blinking his eyes tiredly, his face slightly puzzled.

"Morning Sunshine," I whispered, smiling at him. He inhaled deeply, trying to clear his thoughts. His eyes flickered to the window and then back to me.

"Are we there?" his voice was unnaturally tired. I nodded.

"We're just landing. You were sleeping," I remarked, raising my eyebrows. Edward looked around as if we had just discovered lightning.

"Was I?" he remarked. "That's odd. The last time I slept was at the hospital before Carlisle changed me." I placed my hand in his and was about to say something when suddenly the plane vibrated and a loud screeching came from beneath me. I braced myself for freefall.

"Relax Bella," Edward comforted. "It's just the landing gear." I relaxed slightly, but my hand squeezed his own tightly, which I didn't release until we had touched ground and slowed to a stop. It took several minutes until we were able to exit the plane and the pilot wished us a wonderful stay.

This time Edward didn't even have the energy to protest the wheelchair that was provided, which was slightly worrying as opposed to his normally vehement nature. We made our way to the car rental agency, Carlisle insisting on doing everything legally, which was fine by me. I don't think Charlie would be too happy if I got arrested in Italy.

Carlisle spoke fluent Italian to the servicemen; I'd never really noticed how beautiful the language was. Eventually Carlisle forked over quite a bit of cash and the dealer handed him two keys.

Tossing one to Jasper, who caught it effortlessly, Carlisle led us to the cars. Edward was leaning on my shoulder again, as we had to surrender his wheelchair at the doors of the airport leading to the car rental building.

The cars were nothing stunning, but they were practical and wouldn't stand out in a large crowd. We divided in the same way we had on our way to the airport and made our way into the city. It was exactly as I remembered it, except rather dark and rainy. It seemed strangely empty as well, but I reminded myself the last time I had been here a great festival had been going on and everyone was in the streets to celebrate. This time there was no one to stop us as we entered the heart of the city and I had to bar my mind against the memories that were certain to overwhelm me. It seemed strangely ironic that each time I had been here Edward's life was in danger.

My heart began to race as we parked as closely as we could to what I recognized as the Volturi's headquarters. No sooner had we all gotten from the cars, Carlisle more holding Edward than helping him, when we were surrounded by several tall, dark cloaked figures. I immediately recognized them as the Volturi guard and instinctively moved closer to Edward. I felt strangely fearless, considering I was the only being that still had a heartbeat. One of the taller members of the guard stepped forward, his hair dark as the night.

"Carlisle Cullen?" his voice was like delicate crystal and Carlisle nodded his head in acknowledgment. The guard raised a hand and motioned with his fingers. "Follow me."

The vampires surrounding us began to move and we had no choice but to follow. Not that we wanted to put up any kind of resistance anyways.

The path they led us on was different than my previous experience. I was quite thankful about not having to go down any storm drains. At least this time I wasn't the one slowing down the normally quickly-paced vampires, so I didn't have to endure any leering red eyes. Only a few offhand glances since I was the only human in the group. Emmett and Jasper stepped around me protectively.

Quicker than I realized we were descending to the Volturi's main chamber. I was shaking like a leaf, most likely from the resurfacing memories of my last visit. The vampires I had met last time were by no means the gentle creatures that the Cullens came across as.

The guards slowed to a halt as we approached two huge, foreboding wooden doors. They creaked open ominously without anyone on this side laying a finger on them. For a moment I forgot to breathe as the vampires surrounding us stepped to the side so we could enter the large chamber.

Inside was sparsely inhabited; Caius, Marcus, and Aro were in their usual seats with a few of their most trusted member of the guard, including Jane whom I immediately recognized. Aro rose in one swift motion and approached us so gracefully one would have thought him to be gliding to greet us. His skin was still unnervingly thin, as if it would break at the slightest touch, and his jet black hair was combed carefully down his back.

"Why Carlisle," Aro exclaimed as if overjoyed. "I see you've decided to pay us a little visit. We are extremely honored, it has been ages."

Carlisle's face had assumed a serious and hard demeanor that I had never seen before. It made him look much more intimidating.

"Aro, we come here only with the utmost urgency," Carlisle explained quickly. "Edward has been infected. I know you have the means to cure him."

My body was so tense it began to ache as Aro approached Edward, a curious look on his face.

"Infected you say?" Aro examined Edward closely, though careful not to make contact with him. Marcus and Caius remained seated, giving no indication that they had any intentions of joining their third counterpart.

"Yes," Carlisle stated firmly. "However, I know little of the virus and require your assistance in saving his life." Aro's eyes flickered in my direction.

"Hmm," his voice was antagonizing. "This is interesting, is it not? I am sure you are aware that only a few months ago Edward was standing in this exact same spot, begging to be killed. And now, here you all are, insisting we save his life?"

"Please Aro," Carlisle tried to reason. "I have never asked anything of you before. I cannot do this without your help. I do not know how."

"That is true," Aro remarked, his eyes flickering towards me once again. "But I'm curious as to what you'd be willing to sacrifice to save young Edward here's life."

"Anything," I shouted, surprising myself with my own confidence. From the twisted grin on Aro's pale face, I knew that was exactly the response he had hoped for.

"Anything at all?" his voice was smooth as molasses and he gazed at me intensely.

"No!" Edward snapped sharply. "Stay out of this Bella!" Aro had glided over to me and ran one icy finger down my cheek, causing me to involuntarily shiver. Edward growled in warning and Emmett's grip on my shoulder tightened.

"You do not have to fear Edward," Aro left my side and returned to my love. "I was simply satisfying my own curiosity. Besides, you are too late anyways. There is nothing I can do for you."

It suddenly seemed as if a giant vacuum had been attached to my lungs, sucking all the air from them in on huge gush. I refused to believe what I had just heard. My vision swam dangerously and only Emmett's strong grip assured me that I would manage to stay vertical. Edward's expression hadn't changed, but Carlisle stared at Aro in disbelief.

"You lie," I barely processed Alice's voice behind me. Everything seemed surreal now, as if I were merely a spectator watching through a window. Aro shook his head.

"I'm afraid not," he replied sincerely. "By the time the symptoms are apparent the virus is far too widespread to be reversed. From the look of Edward's condition I would say the disease has already been long at work."

Emmett was gently patting my back as if reminding me to keep breathing. I inhaled deeply and immediately my head stopped spinning. Aro turned and glanced back up at the other two Volturi leaders, who nodded ever so slightly I wasn't even sure I had seen it.

"However," Aro exclaimed as if he had wonderful news and addressed Carlisle personally. "Since I am rather fond of you and your family I shall provide you with enough medicine to cure yourself and anyone else who might have been infected."

Rather forcefully I broke out of Emmett's bear-like grip and took several steps towards the ancient vampire.

"There must be something you can do!" I exclaimed, surprised I even managed to find my voice, although it shook dangerously.

"Ah Bella," Aro gazed at me intently for a brief moment. "Your relationship with Edward never ceases to amaze me. Unfortunately I find no advantage in lying to you. Such a shame too, I hate to see a gift like Edward's go to waste like this. Alas! Thusly the world turns."

Only, at that moment, my world stopped turning.

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_Feedback is greatly appreciated! Let me know what you think!_


	8. Tears Like Rain

_Miss me? Of course you did:) I must say, I've gotten several vehement reviews on the matter of Edward's life and death. Everyone seems for me to want to keep him alive...I wonder why..._

_Anyways, I guess you'll just have to keep reading to find out;) Don't worry though, I love Edward as much as you do, if that comforts anyone at all..._

_Review and Enjoy!_

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A hand grabbed my arm and I nearly jumped a mile in the air. I had been so intent on Aro that I didn't noticed Edward leaning forward to pull me back into the group. He wrapped an arm around me tightly, deserting Carlisle's shoulder for my own. I supported him numbly, not able to bring myself to look at his face for fear of losing all composure. 

It just didn't seem possible. The Volturi were the most powerful vampires in the world. They had to know how to save him! I had been sure they would. There was no other option.

"Jane! Heidi!" Aro called to the two females that stood to the side of the room. They stepped forward obediently. "Would you please prepare some rooms for our guests?" They nodded before exiting, Jane glaring at me menacingly as she passed. She was probably still upset that her special gift failed to work on me.

"What are we supposed to do?" Alice sounded extremely frustrated. "Just sit around and wait?" She didn't have to clarify what we were waiting for. The words were too horrible to even think, none-the-less speak. Aro folded his frail fingers together.

"You may do as you please," he responded, his voice never losing the unnerving calm. "You don't have long to wait."

I desperately wanted to leave the room, to quit this conversation, but Edward's weight against me proved it to be impossible. I knew I had to face the truth, but I didn't want to. It hurt too much.

A strange sensation came over me. It was almost frightening, like walking down a dark alley, certain that someone is watching. I looked straight up and met Marcus's gaze. His milky red eyes were staring at me so hard I could almost feel them boring into my soul. My own eyes were locked into his with such force that I found myself incapable of pulling away. I remembered that his gift was sensing relationships and I knew he was dissecting me, deciphering my bond with Edward. There was something though, something about the way his eyes probed into mine that made me feel sad and I wondered if he had ever loved someone.

At that moment Aro glided in front of me and by the time he moved Marcus's eyes were averted elsewhere, his face giving no indication of the strange moment that had just passed between the two of us. Then, quite promptly, Jane and Heidi reappeared in the doorway.

"Everything is ready," Jane said smoothly, her voice bordering on mocking. How I detested everything about her.

"Wonderful," Aro replied. "Carlisle, you would not mind staying here for a little chat would you? It has been so long and we have many things to discuss."

I had a sneaking suspicion that one of those things was me, for if Edward did die it would surely change certain plans they had about my becoming a vampire. The thought made my heart flutter; there was no way I would agree to living for an eternity without my love. I tried not to think of such things, for now. At least not while Edward was still in my arms.

I hadn't even realized we had been following Jane and Heidi until we reached the elevators in the main lobby of the building. I recognized Gianni, the secretary for the Volturi, behind the receptionist's desk. Obviously her wishes of joining them had not yet been answered, for she was still very much human.

They led us up to the seventh floor and we entered a poorly lit hall. Four doors lined each side; Jane motioned to the rooms on our right.

"These are yours," she instructed. "They are open and you are free to stay as long as you desire." Alice nodded curtly.

"Thank you Jane," she acknowledged, though her eyes held no friendship. Jane smiled in an offhand manner, her eyes resting on Edward, glinting in what appeared to be amusement. Edward matched her stare, cocking his head to one side as if daring her to try anything.

"Enjoy your stay…" she teased, turning her back on us, but throwing one last glance over her shoulder. "…Edward."

For once I was thankful Edward was weighing me down, for I was certain I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from trying to hurt her, which probably would have ended ill for all of us. I was still fuming after the two vampires had disappeared into the elevator.

"Let it go Bella," Jasper squeezed my shoulder, obviously sensing my malicious thoughts, and I gritted my teeth trying to push the fantasies of ripping Jane's head off from my mind. I knew I had to stay strong – for myself and for Edward.

Rosalie had opened the first door on our right and we slowly made our way in. Though he would never admit it, I could tell every step was an effort. He was still unaccepting of anyone's help but my own.

The room was dark like the hallway and someone flicked the light switch behind me. A dull light weakly revealed a spacious room, decorated all in black and red. Large windows lined one wall, and thousands of raindrops softly pattered against them, as if begging to be let in.

Matching overstuffed couches were placed on either side of a mahogany table and an ancient turn-dial phone rested in one corner of the room. Besides the long, red curtains that flowed down on either side of the windows, the walls were bare.

Careful not to trip over anything, I led Edward to the only bed in the large room. It was at least king size, overflowing with pillows, and made of the same dark wood as the table. After making sure Edward and I didn't need any assistance the others politely excuse themselves, claiming to want to check out the other rooms, though I knew they were really just allowing us some time alone. Esme reassured me that they could be back within a moment's notice and I thanked her kindly.

I waited until the door clicked shut behind them before turning back toward Edward, who had propped himself up on the abundance of pillows. Suddenly I had no idea what to say and I leaned against the door, trying to gather my thoughts.

"Isabella Swan, stop moping," Edward's voice rang in my ears and I stared at him incredulously.

"Moping?" I cried, approaching the enormous bed. "Edward, did you not hear anything that the Volturi just said?"

"Every word," Edward replied, his eyes never leaving my face. "And I prefer not to live my last few moments dreading it."

I blinked, not quite processing everything to my usual extent. The bed squeaked slightly as I sat on its edge.

"It can't be true," I whispered, looking down at my feet. "I can't lose you." Edward's arm gripped my own and he pulled me to my back, so my head rested in the gentle grove of his shoulder.

"You won't lose me," his voice was honey in my ears. "I'll always be alive…" he tapped my forehead lightly "…in here." I shifted slightly to wrap my arms around his chest.

"It's not fair," I fiercely blinked back my tears. "You're supposed to live forever,"

"Nothing in life is fair, we just play it the best we can." I shook my head, unwilling to except Edward's fate as easily as Edward himself had. A few tears escaped my eyes, staining Edward's shirt. I felt slightly ashamed that I wasn't more able to control my emotions, to keep the outward cool that the others had. I supposed I was awaiting my own funeral as well though, for without Edward's life mine would surely crumble. Edward seemed to share this thought as he ran his fingers through my hair.

"Bella, I need you to promise me something," his voice was pleading and sincere. A finger hooked under my chin and raised my face so I was mesmerized by smoldering ocher eyes."Promise me you won't give up. Live the life you are meant too."

I wanted to say no, to tell him I couldn't go on alone. That a life without him wasn't a life at all. But locked in Edward's passionate gaze I might as well have surrendered him my every thought, for I could not refuse.

"Promise me," Edward repeated longingly.

"I promise," my voice was faint. I felt slightly bad about making a promise I wasn't sure I could keep.

Edward severed the chains of our stare and I regained hold of my senses. A soft humming surrounded me and I immediately recognized my lullaby. The sweet sound caressed my ears and calmed my anxiety. I closed my eyes, surrendering myself to the song.

I don't know how long we remained like this, lying in each other's embrace, Edward's music calming us both, letting us enjoy what little time we had left together. Eventually a soft rapping on the door broke us out of our reverie. Reluctantly I swung my feet over the edge of the bed. Muted sunlight shone through the window and I was surprised to realize that the night had already passed, though grey clouds still dripped rain from the sky.

The knocking on the door came again and I hurriedly made my way across the room to open it, revealing Carlisle's beautiful face, Esme close behind him. He smiled sadly, wrapping his arms around me, which was surprising at first, for I had never been hugged by Carlisle before. I understood when I heard Carlisle's low voice in my ear and I realized he wanted to tell me something without Edward hearing.

"I need to talk to you in private," Carlisle's voice was barely audible. "Come to my room, soon." He released me without waiting for a response and approached Edward, whose eyes remained half-lidded, as if he were halfway between sleep and consciousness.

"How are you feeling?" Carlisle asked, his face unreadable. Edward smiled sarcastically.

"Right as rain," he replied, his voice slightly drawn. "Did they give you the antidote? For the others?" Carlisle nodded.

"I've already given it to them," Carlisle sounded exactly like when he addressed his patients at the hospital. Edward's shoulders dropped in relief.

"What about any for him?" I barely noticed my voice was rising. "Any for Edward?" Carlisle shook his head, avoiding my accusing glare.

"What if it helps?" My shouts had attracted Alice and Jasper to the doorway. "Can't you even try?"

"Bella…" Edward's soft voice tried to calm me, but something in my mind had snapped.

"Why are they condemning him like this?" I screamed, nearly losing all control of myself.

"It's too late," Carlisle's voice raised slightly to be heard above mind. Rosalie and Emmett slowly approached me behind Alice and Jasper. "There's nothing they can do."

"No!" I shouted. "There has to be something! I don't believe them!" My hands were raking through my hair in anger.

"Bella, stop!" Edward's voice was strangely harsh. I froze, quivering from my sudden rush of adrenaline. Everyone's eyes were locked on me and I couldn't take it any longer. Not looking back once I turned and fled, wanting to get as far away as possible. However, I had barely even made it to the elevator when an icy hand grabbed my arm, stopping me. Judging from the sudden calmness I felt, I guessed it was Jasper.

"Leave me alone," I couldn't muster the energy to be civil. My gaze remained glued to the floor.

"Come back Bella," Jasper's voice was gentle. "He needs to see you." I didn't move, silently willing Jasper to leave. When it was apparent he wasn't going to, I spoke.

"Tell Carlisle I'll speak with him now," I sounded strangely dead. Jasper sighed in frustration.

"You're not the only one who's hurting," his voice was soft and my breath hitched in my throat. "Think about that."

Then he left me, alone and numb. It wasn't long until footsteps approached and I knew Carlisle was behind me. He rested an arm across my shoulders, saying nothing. Eventually the silence started to wear down on me and I turned my face up towards his.

"Carlisle," my voice quivered. "I'm sorry." His eyes connected with mine empathetically and he pulled me in close. I leaned against him, relishing in his comforting closeness. All I wanted was someone to hold me, to support me.

"There's nothing to apologize," Carlisle squeezed me comfortingly. I couldn't hold in my tears any longer and my body shook with my sobs. Carlisle rubbed his hand up and down my arm and I held him tightly. Strangely I wasn't afraid to cry, not around him.

"I wish…" my words were thick with tears. "I wish I was stronger." Carlisle shushed me softly.

"You are strong," Carlisle replied. "More than you realize." I shook my head, drying my eyes with my hands. We had more important matters than my own personal doubt. I cleared my throat.

"What did you need to talk to me about?" I asked, still not releasing my tight grip on him. Carlisle gently eased my arms from around his waist and stepped back slightly to look me full in the face.

"Bella, the Volturi are quite upset," he stated simply. I nodded in understanding.

"Because of me," I finished for him. This time he nodded.

"They do not like your knowledge of our kind. They are threatening to not let us leave unless we change you," he explained, his face watching my reaction closely. I stared at him horrified. The thought of becoming a vampire had appealed to me before solely for the reason of spending an eternity with the one I love. To be condemned to living forever without Edward…I didn't even want to imagine.

"I can't," I whispered. "Not anymore." Carlisle grasped my hand in understanding.

"We don't have to talk about this now," he said gently.

"Was there anything else?" I asked hopefully. "Any other option?" Carlisle's face froze, his lips spread apart as if thoughts were desperately trying to be known. Then he shook his head.

"No," he said and I knew he was lying. However, I was too tired to argue with him. Alice's head stuck out the door.

"Bella…" I needed no more than that and I was by her side. My mind went blank as I reentered the room. Esme was by Edward's side, desperately trying to calm him without touching him. Edward was twitching violently, as if someone was jabbing him in the back with a red-hot poker. His mouth was forming my name wordlessly and I shouted to him, rushing to his side.

The tremors ceased when he heard my voice, his eyes gliding over me, verifying it was really me he heard. Then he closed them, his head falling back in exhaustion, as if my presence was enough to put him at rest.

"Edward?" I said softly, unsure. Outside the sky had darkened and lightening flashed, illuminating the tears the fell from the clouds.

Tears like rain.

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_Ok, so the prologue takes place in between this chapter and the next one, so if you can bear to reread it, than now would be the time. Please let me know what you think, I'm so anxious! I'll see you again Sunday!_


	9. Numb

_Wow, I must say that I am extremely impressed at the amount of vehement reviews that I recieved on the last chapter. They really made me smile, even though some of them were as good as death threats...They really do inspire me to keep writing, as well as boosting me confidence as a writer, so I truly thank everyone who takes the time to review!_

_I'm updating early partly because I recieved so many wonderful reviews, and partly because I'm going to be gone tomorrow, so instead of making you wait an extra day, I thought I would give you a nice surprise. _

_I'll just say that there is still a lot left to the story, so don't resign yourself to hating me just yet. You might be pleasently surprised;) (or you might not, I can't seem to remember...) Anyways, another reminder that the prologue takes place between the last chapter and this one, so if you want to reread it, than do so before reading this chapter. _

_I love hearing your thoughts, so please tell me what you think! Enjoy!_

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I wasn't crying. You can't cry when you feel nothing. My brain had shut down, my senses closed off. Perhaps in protection. The hole in my chest after Edward had left so many months ago was nothing compared to the burning wound I felt when Edward's body went still in my arms. It wasn't merely the punctured heart from before, it was as if someone had physically cut me open and ripped it out. I could feel the blood draining from the wound, taking my life with it.

Then it had stopped. A door had been shut on my mind, barricading all my emotions. I just sat numbly, holding Edward's lifeless hand. I couldn't even blink, just sit and breathe. Offhandedly I became aware of the others in the room; seeing them, but at the same time, not. Alice was sobbing dryly into Jasper's shoulder, Rosalie sitting on one of the couches staring blankly, Emmett by her side. Esme had fled, presumably to Carlisle. No one said anything. The silence was oppressing, like a thick blanket muffling all thought.

Some part of me didn't believe, couldn't believe. The thought of Edward dead, gone forever, was too ridiculous. Sure he might leave for various periods of time, but he always came back. Always. Never was a word I couldn't even fathom. Forever was too long.

My gaze was locked on his face; death had not taken any of its beauty. In fact, with his eyes closed, he looked as if he were simply sleeping. Like he would wake up at any moment. Only, he didn't. He remained locked in death's icy kiss, a prisoner.

Time passed. I'm not sure how long it was before anyone moved. Rosalie was the first. She stirred slightly before rising to her feet and pausing briefly at the side of the bed. Then she left, Emmett close to follow. Alice stayed the longest, holding one of the bedposts tightly. The silence remained, each of us lost in our own thoughts.

Eventually Carlisle entered the room. He hesitated in the doorway and when he finally came forward I could tell every step was a struggle. He shakily gripped the hand I wasn't holding, which had cooled nearly to its normal iciness in the hours that had passed. My gaze never left Edward's still face, but I could tell Carlisle's eyes were filled with tears that could never fall. Alice's own eyes had left her brother and were gazing at Carlisle, monitoring a reaction she had most likely already seen.

"Just…" Carlisle's voice cracked and he started again, speaking to no one in particular. "Just before his mother died, I promised her…I promised I would save her son." If I could still feel my heart in my body I'm sure it would have died a little more.

"You did," Alice replied. "You gave him a life that exceeded anything he could have had before." I was amazed at her strength to speak. Carlisle shook his head.

"He was never happy," he said softly. "He never liked what he had become."

"Carlisle," Alice's voice was soothing. "This isn't your fault. If there was anything we could have done to prevent it I would have seen it." Faintly I wondered if this was how she viewed everything, or if she was simply saying it to help Carlisle feel better. He said nothing for a long while.

The bed shook slightly as Carlisle let Edward's hand drop. I could feel his eyes on me, but I still couldn't tear my eyes away from my love. I doubted anything could have moved me short of physical force. The feeling was slightly familiar, but in a different way. It reminded me of when Edward had left and I had become zombie woman. Only this time it was worse, a million times worse than a zombie. I was catatonic woman.

Carlisle made a noise as if to say something, but then seemed to change his mind, swiftly exiting the room. Alice glanced at me helplessly before following, leaving me alone.

Days passed. I only knew it was days because of the lightening and darkening of the room. Time seemed to flow strangely now, at times going by in quick bursts before slowing down agonizingly. I remained constantly at Edward's side, clutching his cold hand, occasionally stroking my fingers through his silky copper hair. People came and went, but I paid them no mind. Every so often someone would try to talk to me, to get me out of the room, but my unresponsiveness eventually caused them to give up. Several times I heard them whispering about me worriedly, but I didn't care. I didn't care about anything anymore. I figured if I just sat here long enough, perhaps my own body would wither and die and I could join him, even if it was in death.

When Esme tried to talk to me for the first time, I responded to her as I had all the others, remaining still as stone, giving no indication that I had even heard her. First she merely said my name, sitting next to me on the bed, her arm resting loosely around my waist. Then she spoke again, her voice pained but still full of concern.

"Bella, when did you last eat?" she gazed at me heavily. I made no response, simply staring at Edward's face, as if he were a safe haven.

"I know you're hurting," her voice was gentle, understanding. "We all are. But it has been four days, you can't stay like this." With her words the door in my mind began to splinter, stabbing pains penetrating my thoughts. I wanted it to stop, I wanted to feel numb.

"Bella," she continued "he wouldn't want you to be like this." I inhaled sharply at the rough and raw emotions that were seeping through my broken door. I couldn't face it, I wasn't strong enough. Frantically I tried to board up my mind, anything to stop the pain I knew was coming, but it was too late. My barrier had broken, broken from soft, caring words.

Quiet as the wind the others began to enter the room. Emmett first, followed by Carlisle, than Jasper, Alice and Rosalie taking up the rear. Desperately I wished they would go away; leave me alone as they had done before. Their eyes on my still figure were like giant spotlights, pointing at me, watching my every movement.

"Have you…?" Carlisle whispered to his wife softly and I felt her shake her head. He leaned on the bed lightly, his spotlight gaze the brightest of them all.

"Bella," he said gently, as if I were made of glass and might shatter at any second. "The Volturi wish to see you." My grip on Edward's hand tightened but other than that I remained in my regular paralyzed state. Carlisle's hand rested on mine and I jerked slightly, surprised at the contact.

"Please Bella," he pleaded. For the first time in four days my eyes left Edward's face and flickered up towards Carlisle. He looked exhausted. I shook my head slightly before lowering my gaze again.

"If you don't go to them, they are going to come here to you," Carlisle explained, his voice a little harder. "We don't want to agitate them any more than we already have." A single tear slid down my cheek; I couldn't leave Edward's side. I couldn't.

"Please Bella," he repeated. "I don't want to have to force you." I watched as the stain from my tear spread slowly on the bed, the blanket absorbing the moisture. Esme slid gracefully off the bed, stepping back slowly. I truly didn't want to make this any harder for them, but I physically couldn't move. My grieving mind wouldn't let me.

However, when Carlisle gripped my shoulder, something happened I hadn't anticipated. I thrashed out violently, no longer seeming to have any control over my actions. Emmett was quickly behind me, forcefully holding my arms behind me, my body jerking, trying to get free. Carlisle grabbed my legs, which were kicking forcefully, and they pulled me off the bed. My eyes were locked on Edward's body, it seemed hundreds of miles away. Suddenly I had a terrifying fear that it was going to disappear; gone in a flash, never to return again. I began to shout, crying out for them to let me go, for Edward to stay, to not leave me.

It didn't take long until I became too exhausted to continue fighting, and my body went limp in their grasp. Carlisle lowered my feet to ground and Emmett held up my weak body, which surely would have collapsed if not for his strong grip. Sobs racked my body, tears that had been held back for too long flowing down my face. I felt Alice's tiny grip on my shoulder and her voice was comforting in my ear.

"It will get better," she whispered. "I know." My tears slowed to a stop as I looked into her heartbroken face. She smiled reassuringly.

"Come on," her voice had never sounded so beautiful. "Let's get you cleaned up." I nodded, allowing Emmett to help me from the room, not having the energy to argue anymore. He led me to the next room down the hall, which I faintly noticed was identical to the one Edward's body rested in. On the table was a tray of untouched food, obviously meant for me. Alice handed me some bread and instructed me to eat. I obeyed mechanically, not really tasting it. After having eaten, I did feel a bit stronger and revitalized and Emmett released his hold on me, still watching me closely.

Rosalie brought me a fresh change of clothes and the guys politely excused themselves while I changed. The whole time Edward's face was imprinted in my mind, lingering behind my eyes. I wondered if it would ever go away, the constant reminder was unbearably painful. My breath caught in my throat at the thought; Alice and Rosalie shared a worried look. Alice grasped my hand in her own and led me out to the others who were waiting patiently.

The elevator doors opened and when I stepped in I was greeted by four other Bella's. I guess on the way up I hadn't really noticed the walls were plated in mirrors. My reflection shocked me. My eyes were bloodshot and deep purple rings shadowed my face from lack of sleep. My shoulders were slumped and hopeless. In truth, I looked awful.

Alice, Rosalie, and Carlisle joined me in the elevator. The others claimed to want to take the stairs, although I knew it was because they didn't want to crowd me. Unsurprisingly they were already at the bottom by the time the elevator let us out.

Every step I took towards the Volturi's main chamber was filled with dread. I didn't know what awaited me behind the ominous doors, all I knew was at this moment I would rather die than be trapped in the hell I was living now.

Aro greeted us. Caius was standing a distance off, and Marcus was nowhere to be seen. It was odd; I had never seen one without the other two close by. I half-wondered what could have drawn him away.

For a while Aro just stood, his eyes locked on me, my own eyes gazing uselessly at the floor. Eventually he spoke.

"I assume Carlisle has explained our predicament to you," Aro stated. I didn't reply, loathing the cold hearted vampire before me. "It is simply too much of a risk for us to have an outsider privy to our world, especially one who knows us so intimately. And now that you no longer have a close tie…" Carlisle cut him off.

"Aro, she is in no condition for this," he said forcefully. Aro gleamed angrily. "She won't talk. She loved him too much to betray us."

"What are you proposing?" Aro asked, sensing something behind Carlisle's words. "You want us to keep her alive? Do you understand what that entails? Are you willing to monitor her for the rest of her unhappy life?" Carlisle clenched his teeth together tightly.

"If I have to, yes," he replied. I knew I should say something, to stop their useless fighting over me, over a life I no longer desired, but no words came to mind. I simply remained staring at the ground helplessly. Aro's words made clear what Carlisle had been hiding from me earlier. They either wanted to change me, or to kill me. "At least let her come home for the burial. Let her recover." Aro glided to me and cupped my chin in his spidery finger, raising my head to gaze into his own milky red eyes. I stared at him lifelessly.

"I see," he said, as if observing something interesting. Then he released me and my head fell back to its former position. "Well, I doubt she'll last too long, vampire or not." Jasper growled slightly in my defense. Aro looked at him as if amused.

"This is quite intriguing," he remarked. "A whole group of vampires willing to protect one weak human." Carlisle stepped forward defensively.

"She has no quarrel with you Aro," his voice was cold. "What does it matter to you if she goes?" Aro gazed at Carlisle intensely before gliding towards Caius and they quietly exchanged words. When he returned his eyes were glinting dangerously.

"We'll allow Bella to leave only if you agree to comply to these conditions," Aro bargained and Carlisle nodded, agreeing before he had even heard the offer. "For the entire time Bella remains human, she must stay in your care and watch. We shall be allowed into your home at any time and for any length of time to ensure no goings on are happening to our…disapproval. Lastly, if any word of our existence is leaked or somehow used against us we shall immediately dispose of your little human and whoever else is involved."

I wanted to tell Carlisle not to agree, that I wasn't worth all that, but I knew no words I could say would've made him change his mind. Carlisle nodded quickly.

"Agreed," he replied and both Aro and Caius smiled happily, though somehow I sensed here was something behind their grins, something they weren't willing to share. Or perhaps I was distraught and overly paranoid. Either way, I didn't like it.

"Good," Aro exclaimed, staring at me hungrily. "You are free to go then." It was Esme who spoke next.

"What about the virus?" her voice questioned. Aro waved it off.

"Edward's body is being sterilized as we speak," he replied and very muscle in my body tensed. The thought of someone else, some cold hearted vampire, doing anything to my love's body made my blood boil. "He'll soon be ready for your removal." He turned as if making to leave, before turning back one last time.

"I must say," he remarked "I've never known anyone to survive as long as Edward did." His gaze fell on me. "Most succumb after a few hours once the symptoms are apparent. Something must have been keeping his will to live so strong."

Then in one sweeping motion he turned against, motioning for us to leave. We did without hesitation.

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_So, not too much of a cliffhanger...I don't think...REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!! See you again Monday!_


	10. Going Home

_It's Monday! Well, I'm really quite pleased at everyone's reaction to Edward's death. I haven't recieved a single death threat! This chapter is pretty short, it's more of a filler than anything. I'm not really sure how much I like it. It kind of feel rather awkward to me. It mainly serves to get me from point a to point b. So bare with me and I promise the next chapter will start the second wave of excitement! Ha ha!_

_Enjoy!_

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I hated the thought of Edward locked inside the sleek black box, but we couldn't very well bring his body on coach. The Volturi had a surprising number of coffins readily available, considering they were all immortal. Apparently being a guard of the Volturi was a high risk job. 

I hadn't said anything since my outburst before our meeting with Aro and Caius. Every time I tried my mouth got dry and my voice seemed to be swallowed. There wasn't much I actually wanted to talk about, everything was too painful. I had even given up trying to sleep; as soon as my eyes drifted shut I was greeted by Edward's face. It began with the first time I had ever laid eyes on him and continued chronologically through every moment we had ever had together. It was taunting and cruel.

By the time we were all set to leave I hadn't slept more than an hour at a time in six days. My eyes had trouble focusing and I could barely walk in a straight line. The only thing I was truly aware of was the jagged edges where my heart used to be and the pain emanating from the wound. This was pain they couldn't have even begun to recreate in the darkest chambers of the tower of London.

I didn't even realize we were at the airport until Carlisle was asking me for my passport. I had been tailing Emmett mindlessly after he had instructed me to follow him, too absorbed in my own thoughts to really notice my surroundings. I fumbled in my pocket until I had a good enough grip to pull it out. The lady behind the desk smiled and motioned us through.

Alice had bought me a sandwich as we waited in the terminal for the plane to begin boarding. It sat uneaten in my hands. The happiness of the airport was stifling. Everywhere people were greeting loved ones with wide arms and joyous faces or kissing them goodbye, promising to come meet them as soon as they returned. My love was on a luggage car somewhere, being loaded into the underbelly of the plane.

It wasn't fair.

Eventually we were ushered onto the plane, though not first class this time, and I watched in detachment as the earth became smaller and smaller beneath us, the cars looking like tiny ants scurrying for shelter. I was too exhausted to even be slightly afraid.

I became aware of Carlisle handing me something – he had specially requested to be sat next to me – and I raised the beverage to my lips, allowing the cool juice to sooth my aching throat. Only a few moments passed since I had drunk when my head began to feel heavy as lead and I had to fight to keep my eyes open.

I turned my head towards Carlisle, vowing to never accept anything from him again. His cool hand felt my forehead gently and I felt my eyes drooping shut against my will.

"Sleep Bella," I heard, or imagined, Carlisle's voice in my ear. Unwillingly I did.

I slept long and hard, no dreams able to penetrate the protective shield that the drugs gave me, for which I was quite thankful. A gentle rocking awoke me and my eyes blinked blurrily, trying to rid the muffling fingers of sleep from my mind. I realized I was no longer on the plane but in Carlisle's car, the countryside of Washington blurring passed the window. Looking forward I saw Esme smiling at me delicately. I returned my gaze out the window, willing myself not to think of anything.

It wasn't long until we reached Forks and Carlisle pulled in front of Charlie's house, much to my disappointment. I didn't really want to be home, though I suppose there weren't any paces I really wanted to be.

Both Carlisle and Esme walked me up to the door, which opened before they even had a chance to knock, an anxious Charlie appearing in the doorway. It was obvious he had been anxiously awaiting any word from me. His expression grew worried at my deadened appearance.

"What happened?" he asked, his eyes redirecting towards Carlisle and Esme.

"May we come in?" Carlisle inquired politely. Charlie looked abashed at his forgetful hospitality and ushered us inside. His brow furrowed at my movements, probably reminding him all too distinctly of my zombie-like nature from several months ago.

Carlisle was speaking to Charlie, my father's face falling with every word. I wasn't listening; any more explanations of Edward's death would be too much to bear. Instead I sat numbly, trying not to remember a certain vampire holding me as we watched a movie, neither of us paying much attention to the TV.

I shut my eyes, willing the memory away, trying to keep myself together. Carlisle gripped my shoulder, assuring me he would be in contact soon, and then they left. Ignoring Charlie's careful questions and worried glances I trudged up the stairs to my room.

It all seemed so unreal now, sitting here alone. Only the tender hole in my chest was a painful reminder to the bitter reality. Again time passed in odd spurts and I slept only when it was physically impossible to remain awake any longer for Edward still visited my dreams. I wished Carlisle had left me some of those sleeping pills.

Unlike last time Edward was gone I didn't even attempt to make Charlie believe I was ok. I simply remained in my room, oblivious to Charlie or Alice's visits.

I knew I was wasting away, in body and mind, but I no longer cared. Nothing seemed to matter anymore; the whole reason of my existence was dissipated. Eventually I found myself wishing I would die, and I even began to formulate plans in my mind, though they were never to thorough or sincere in fear that Alice might foresee something. However, I wasn't sure how long I could last like this, promise to Edward or not.

The first time I emerged from the house was for the burial. It was a small ordeal, only me and the rest of Edward's family. His grave was in a secluded corner of Fork's cemetery and bore only his name, for officially he had already died and been buried nearly a hundred years ago.

I was almost certain my heart would give out as the long, black coffin was lowered into the hole, misted surreally with raindrops. My eyes blurred and tears streaked my cheeks, an all-too-common occurrence. Slowly dirt was pushed back into the depressing grave. I watched unmoving, unbelieving, until all that was left was a lightly raised mound of dark earth. It seemed impossible that the only person I ever truly loved was buried beneath that mound.

Alice and Rosalie laid flowers, stunningly red, on top and turned to leave. I wanted to join them, to leave this yard of death, but I couldn't. It was as though some kind of magnetic force had rooted me to the spot, allowing me only to dry my face of falling tears.

I became aware of Carlisle at my side. He was looking at the grave sadly; I knew he was silently blaming himself for what had happened. Staring meaningfully into his drawn face I feared of what would befall this family. I feared it very much.

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_I'll try and update again Wednesday, but I might be at my grandma's. Plus, I think I want to perfect the next chapter just a little more. Review!!!!!_


	11. Unexpected Visitors

_Ya! The moment you've all been waiting for...or is it..._

_I suppose I need another disclaimer that all the history stuff I made up for this chapter is simply that...made up. It is in no way referenced to anything Stephenie Meyer has said or written, I just simply created it for this story. And I really want to know what you guys think of it._

Alas, only four more chapters after this...tear...Enjoy!

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**Two months later.**

Every day was a living hell. Carlisle had arranged with Charlie for me to live with them, at least for the time being, in order to keep up his side of the Volturi's deal. I looked at the raised scars on my wrists. After two suicide attempts it wasn't hard for Charlie to be convinced that I needed full time care, which his job obviously couldn't allow.

I hadn't planned to try killing myself, it had just happened. I barely even knew what I was doing, I just wanted to pain to stop. Guilt had always followed; I knew Edward would be furious if he knew I was reacting like this, which only made it worse. However, with the heavy antidepressant Carlisle was giving me and the fact I wasn't even allowed to shower alone, there wasn't much chance that I could even speculate about taking my life again.

Alice was with me mostly, though sometimes she switched off with Esme. It wasn't a hard job, I supposed, watching me. Most of the time I simply sat, staring blankely, lost in my own thoughts. I still hadn't spoken, anything I had to say would likely lead to painful conversations I wasn't ready to face.

Jacob had stopped by a few times, which was quite surprising seeing as I was living in a household of vampires. Even more surprisingly they had let him in, and he sat by my side quietly, gently trying to get me to talk. I felt horrible about my inability to respond, and I knew Jake's former warnings had been right. He knew it too – my relationship with Edward had caused me nothing but pain. However, he was tactful enough not to say this out loud, sometimes simply telling me about what was happening in Forks and on the reservation, other times trying to help me move on. Only, I wasn't ready to move on.

The family had been horribly torn apart. Rosalie and Emmett had left; truthfully I think I depressed her too much to stay. The last I heard they were somewhere in upstate New York, though I wasn't quite sure. Carlisle worked long hours at works, coming home for merely two or three hours before returning to the hospital, which drove Esme crazy. I had never heard them fight before these horrifying turn of events. I wouldn't have even believed it possible. Alice and Jasper barely talked to each other and Jasper had given up being anywhere near humans, besides me. Perhaps in such a depressed state he didn't trust the little control he had built up over the years.

Basically, life sucked, for everyone.

It was raining exceptionally hard when the knock came on the door. I made no reaction to the sound; it was probably just Charlie, stopping by as he occasionally did. He had given up all hope of me going to college or even carrying on a halfway normal life a long time ago.

Alice rushed to the door and the velvet voice that greeted her caused me to look up in surprise. A handsome vampire I had never seen before stood in the doorway. His good looks were offset by his short stature, standing barely taller than Alice. Red eyes gleamed in the light, though he displayed no air of danger or unfriendliness.

"Hello Ryan," Alice greeted the strange vampire. He smiled widely, revealing stunning white teeth.

"Hello Alice," he said rather familiarly. Stepping around her he entered the room and when Alice turned to face him again I sensed strong dislike in her eyes.

"I see the Volturi has finally managed to snare you," she remarked coldly and the vampire chuckled softly.

"Are you surprised?" his eyes flickered over her petite frame.

"No," she stated simply. "You always were quick to conform." He grinned at her before motioning towards my still form.

"Is this the girl?" his voice was slightly amused. Alice looked furious.

"This girl," her fists were clenched tightly "is Bella. And yes, she is who I am assuming you were sent to check on."

"Well, this should be easy enough," he remarked. I stared at him blankly, not giving him any sort of reaction, which seemed to slightly irk him. He looked away from me.

"How long are you here?" Esme's voice joined the conversation. She sounded no happier than Alice.

"However long I see fit to ensure the Volturi's secret," he replied casually. "Is that a problem?" Alice bit her lip, swallowing not-so-welcoming words I imagined.

"Not at all," Esme's voice sounded rather forced. He smiled again and leisurely took a seat across from me, opening his mouth to say something. Before a single syllable could be uttered I stood up forcefully and quickly made my way up the stairs, having no desire to be subject to the pending conversation.

I had planned to just go to Alice's room, where I had been sleeping, but something made me stop before Edward's closed door. I hadn't had the nerve to go in there since we had returned knowing the emotions that would greet me would be too painful. I'm not sure why I couldn't pass by the room this time, but I found myself silently creaking the unused door open and entering, as if I no longer controlled my own actions.

Everything was exactly as I remembered it and I could almost forget anything had ever happened. It was strangely peaceful at first, running my fingers threw his vast collection of music, tenderly feeling the buttons and keys of the ridiculously expensive stereo system. When I closed my eyes it was easy to imagine my angel in the room with me, standing behind me, reaching to stroke my hair with his long fingers. I could almost smell his alluring scent, hear his honey laughter. Turning around quickly, my eyes snapping open, I felt the wound in my chest sear painfully. It was stupid to believe he was here. He was dead. Dead and never coming back.

My pain began to transform into anger, hate. I was furious with the world for ending his beautiful life, angry at him for leaving me alone. My hate had no rational thought behind it; it was simply a way to vent what I was feeling. It consumed my mind.

In rage I grabbed handfuls of CDs, as many as I could hold, and threw them forcefully against the wall, taking slight pleasure as they smashed and fell to the floor. It felt good to let out these months of pent up emotions and soon I couldn't stop. Everything I could get a hold of I broke, smashed, hurled, or ruined in any way I could. I even threw open his closest and began to tear up his clothes.

Eventually I collapsed in the center of the broken room, my anger transforming into hot tears.

"Are you finished?" A cool voice came from the corner of the room and my head whipped up quickly. At first I thought I was suffering some form of delirium.

"Marcus?" my voice cracked slightly from being so long out of use. The ancient Volturi glided towards me, snowy hair falling in careful strands around his equally pale face. He looked strangely out of place here in Edward's littered room.

"That was quite an impressive display," his face was unearthly calm as he knelt beside me. I glanced anxiously toward the door, there was no way any of the vampires downstairs didn't hear my little outburst.

"Don't worry," he reassured me. "They don't know."

"How…" I faltered, seemingly unable to form entire thoughts long enough to speak them.

"That's Ryan's gift," Marcus explained. "He can block the senses, though he has to be almost inconveniently close. Alice's visions will also be affected, and Jasper's empathy." I stared at him blankly.

"Why are you here?" I questioned softly. He leaned back slightly, gazing me in the eyes sincerely.

"I was in love once too," his eyes misted in memory "a very long time ago. She was the most beautiful creature in the world. Though she was a vampire as myself, my bond with her was as strong as yours is with Edward. Nothing she might have done could possibly caused me any rancor – to me she was perfect.

"The Volturi were relatively new, and we were struggling to keep the others of our kind under control and out of detection. We were constantly fighting one group or another, trying to keep the world from erupting in chaos. Claudia always insisted on fighting by my side, and though I was loath to expose her to such danger, I knew she would have it no to her way.

"I can distinctly remember her face when another vampire stuck her, fatally. Her golden hair was shining brilliantly; her porcelain face had never seemed more beautiful as they dragged her away. Desperately I tried to follow, forgetting all else except saving Claudia, my own life nothing next to hers. Unfortunately their numbers were too great and we were quickly overwhelmed. Aro, Caius, and I were the only ones able to escape alive.

"Her shredded body was burned close enough that I could see the great plume of smoke, rising like death above all else. For days her scent lingered in the air. My world shattered and I became quite similar to the way you are now. I desperately wanted to die, to end the pain I was feeling, to join my lost love in the next life.

"However, my duties as a Volturi soon refused me any time I had to grieve over her, to replay in my thoughts countless times what I had done wrong, why it was my fault Claudia was dead. The pain never lessened as time went on, instead I learned more effective ways of dealing with it. Even now there is hardly a moment that goes by where she is not in my thoughts somewhere, lingering at the back of my mind."

Marcus's voice faded and I was left breathless and entranced.

'I'm truly sorry," I said sadly, unsure of what I was supposed to say. "But what has this to do with me?" Marcus was silent for a moment and I waited patiently for his answer.

"I can see your relationship with Edward, torn slightly, but otherwise still strong, even in death," his words were slow and deliberate. "I do not wish the suffering I have lived through on any other living soul, though I can clearly see it written in all over your face, deeply imbedded in your human eyes.

"I have come to help you, if you are willing, to bring Edward back. To put a stop to your pain." I blinked several times, unbelieving of what I had just heard. This was just some cruel trick.

"Of course," Marcus continued, as if he needed further justification. "I had to provide different incentives in order for Aro and Caius to agree. The Cullen family is a very important little community to us vampires, it would prove ill for us if they were to break apart because of Edward's untimely death."

"Wait!" I almost shouted, looking at the door nervously, hoping no one would enter yet. Ryan must've been doing a wonderful job blocking the noise I was making. "What are you saying? Edward is dead! He's buried in the cemetery." Marcus nodded understandingly.

"Surely, after all your experience with the supernatural you wouldn't find it to horribly hard to believe that it is possible to bring back the dead," his voice was quite and smooth, every word weighted carefully. My mind was spinning; I wanted to believe, desperately I wanted to believe, but my mind wouldn't let me. I couldn't stand losing Edward again.

"If you can bring back the dead, why didn't you bring back Claudia?" I tested. Marcus's face didn't change from its eerie calm.

"Claudia's body was destroyed - ripped and burned. If I had brought her back there would have been no place for her spirit to return to," the ancient vampire explained. "Edward's body, however, remains in perfect condition regardless of whether it is buried or not."

"And you want to bring him back simply because you don't want me to feel pain?" I questioned. Something didn't seem to add up.

"Is that so hard to believe?" Marcus questioned. I furrowed my brow in thought.

"Well, yes," I replied truthfully. Marcus nodded sadly.

"I'm afraid you are right," he confirmed and I gazed at him, growing more confused every second. "Where as my motives I believe to be pure, Aro and Caius have a slightly different agenda. They agreed to my helping you only if you agreed to convert to vampirism before the year's end."

There was something in Marcus's misty red eyes, something that moved me deeply. Perhaps I was recognizing his deep love for Claudia as equal to my own for Edward. Right now, we seemed almost as equals, both suffering from the loss of the one we had loved more than anything in the world. Perhaps Marcus believed that by helping me, by ending my pain, he could help to put his at rest, once and for all. That was if he was even speaking the truth, though I found it very hard to doubt him.

"I would do anything to bring him back," I whispered quietly, hope beginning to rise like a bubble in my chest. The thought of having Edward back nearly made me start crying again. Marcus's face rose into a hint of a smile.

"Then come with me," he said, rising gracefully to his feet and extending a long, frail looking hand down to me. I accepted, preparing myself to face whatever was to come.

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_Ha ha ha! Bet you want to know what happens! I can't update tomorrow, I will try on Friday, but this weekend I am going back to my mom's house in Montana, so I'm going to be terribly busy. I'm really sorry, but the next time I might be able to update is Monday. I will try my hardest for earlier though!!!!!!!!!!! Reviewing might help motivate me too;)_


	12. Wake the Dead

_Sorry it has taken me so long to post, even though I'm one day earlier than I thought I would be. I didn't mean to leave you hanging on that cliffhanger so long, I swear! It's so good to be home though, after five weeks. _

_So, I happen to really like this chapter. More questions answered, and I hope by the end my death threats will stop;) I hope you enjoy it as much as I do._

_Happy Canada Day!_

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Despite his frail appearance, Marcus was inhumanly strong. He carried me as if I weighed no more than a feather, running faster than a normal human could have seen to the cemetery. The grace with which Marcus moved made Edward's movements seem like the jerky movements of a small child, though even his were a million times more graceful than my own. I felt extremely inadequate next to Marcus and it was hard to believe he was actually doing this for me, although I suppose it fit nicely with the Volturi's other agenda.

We had left through the window; I closed my eyes as Marcus had leapt from the second story ledge, my body clasped firmly in his arms. I would have thought with the amount of times I had been carried by unearthly creature I would be slightly used to it, but since when did my body react in any way that I liked?

My heart beat frantically as we approached Edward's grave, the mound of dirt had been packed even with the rest of the ground some time ago and grass had begun to grow over it. I had not been back since he had been first buried. My throat swallowed convulsively and I stood deathly still, as if caught in a spell, preparing myself for what I was about to do.

"Isabella?" Marcus's voice broke my reverie and I directed my gaze towards him, faintly wondering where he had gotten the shovels that now rested in his hands. "Are you ready?" I closed my eyes tightly for few seconds before nodding and extending a hand for one of the shovels. The wood felt cold and strangely dead in my hands.

Taking a deep breath I forcefully shoved the shovel into the soft earth, pulling up a large clod of dirt before throwing it to the side. Marcus soon joined me, and together we tore up the earth beneath our feet.

The work was long and slow, at least on my part, and I was soon out of breath. Marcus was already tapping the top of the wood coffin by the time I had dug a mere three feet. He said nothing however, and I stepped back slightly as he took over the side I had been working on, finishing it in a matter of minutes. His face was impassive as he turned back to me, it was hard to tell if he thought my slow human nature a nuisance or not.

It was then I noticed the elaborate pulley system that had been rigged in the trees above us. He had certainly planned heavily on my agreement. Lithely the ancient vampire jumped into the deep grave, instructing me to lower him the large hooks that were secured on both ends of the ropes. Once they had been tightly fastened on each end of the coffin he was suddenly out of the grave, faster than I could see, and easily raising the black box from the deep hole. I swallowed hard and desperately hoped no one would decide on a late night cemetery visit, for I don't think it would serve my sanity too well if someone caught me exhuming Edward's body from his grave.

Marcus pulled the nails from the lid as if they were cheap thumbtacks, and in a cloud of dust, pushed the cover to the ground. Immediately I looked away, willing my body to stay in one piece. Even such a brief glimpse of Edward's perfect face hacked open the hole in my chest a little wider and I was sure if I turned around it would tear me in two. Marcus stood to the side patiently, allowing me as much time as I needed.

Gathering as much courage as I could I forced myself to turn back to Edward's body, trying to ignore the blood I was sure was spilling from my wounded heart. He looked exactly as he had mere seconds after his last breath. I had never seen anything more beautiful in my life, and I was afraid to touch him, as if he might disintegrate beneath my fingers.

Marcus appeared beside the coffin, gracefully clutching the edges with his nearly translucent fingers. His eyes were locked on me with intense seriousness.

"Isabella, you have to die," he said soberly. I pursed my lips.

"What?" I asked.

"It will only be briefly, and I can easily resuscitate you, but the only way to bring Edward back is to physically lead him back to his body," Marcus eyes examined my own carefully, as if measuring how I was going to take this new onslaught of information.

"You have to kill me?" I don't know why I sounded so concerned since I had already tried to myself, twice. Marcus nodded. He pulled out a small glass vial from his robe.

"This is a potent, but easily reversible sedative. A small amount should be enough to slow your heartbeat to a stop. I can keep blood flowing to your brain for several minutes, staving off any chance of brain damage before it is necessary for me to resuscitate you."

My gaze fell to Edward's unmoving face. I tried to imagine what it would be like to see him smiling again, to hear his laugh, tingle as his fingers stroked my back. Suddenly there was no question in my mind. I would do anything to bring him back.

"What do I have to do?" I asked Marcus, my tone apparent that I was agreeing to his plan. Marcus grinned wider than I had ever seen him.

"You must be careful," he instructed, and I listened closely to every word. "Vampires with such a strong will to live usually do not pass on to the next life, remaining stuck in what you humans would call limbo. We are relying on this for Edward, for I cannot allow your heart to remain stopped long enough for you to pass that far into death. You must find him and convince him to follow you. In any way possible you must be connected when I bring you back, and you must not let go. You need to pull him back to the physical world so he can be rightfully returned to his body." I nodded in understanding.

"How long will I have?" I asked.

"Time works differently in death, so it is impossible to say – a few human hours at most. Just go as fast as you can." My hand shook violently as I took the poison from Marcus. I knew this was stupid, that this couldn't possibly be real, and I forcefully shoved those thoughts away into the back of my mind. Even if it wasn't real, if this was just some elaborate plan to be rid of me, at least I would be with my angel again, even if it was in death.

Quickly I lifted the vial and emptied the contents into my mouth. It tasted bitter and I nearly gagged. Almost immediately I felt my body growing rigged, than sluggish. I leaned against the coffin as long as I could, acutely aware of Marcus's eyes on my dying body, knowing he was listening to my slowing heart. The world began to grow cloudy and dark over my eyes and as I slid to the ground I was aware of a slight burning in my lungs as they cried to my unmoving heart for oxygen.

The next thing I knew I was standing and my feet were wet. I looked around me in wonder. I was at the edge of a large river, the water an unearthly blue and the sky around me black as pitch. It was like the darkest night I had ever seen, though no stars twinkled overhead. It was simply black.

I turned in a circle, unsure of what to do, the water splashing around me feet. A long white boat was approaching quickly; something about it bothered me, though I couldn't quite tell what. As it got closer I realized it was floating upstream, fighting the strong current like it was simply a gentle breeze.

It resembled a long canoe, and it stopped beside me, though I could not discern how. A stunningly beautiful woman sat in the boat, her face as perfect as a porcelain doll, her flowing hair reminded me startlingly of sunflowers. I didn't need to see the red of her eyes to know she was a vampire.

"It is time for you to pass over," her voice was surprisingly deep, but smooth as the richest cream. Entranced, I walked towards the ivory white boat, the water rising nearly to my waist before I reached it. She gracefully lowered a slim hand which I accepted, climbing into the boat, which remained as still as if it were somehow attached to the river bottom. Her eyes searched mine once I was seated, the water somehow magically disappearing from my clothes.

"You are not ready to pass," it was not a question. I shook my head, reminding myself why I was here. Edward.

"I am looking for someone," I explained and her face flashed with surprise before she was able to mask it.

"That is a mighty task you face," she said gravely. "Not one that many undertake." I suddenly realized we were moving again, though this time it was with the flow of the river, not against it.

"Perhaps you can help me?" I asked, not having the faintest idea of how to begin. Her face remained unnervingly still.

"Who is it you wish to find," her lips barely moved as she spoke.

"Edward Cullen," I replied, the name moving off my lips easier than I would have imagined. To my surprise her lips curled up in a faint smile.

"You must be Bella Swan I presume?" I tilted my head slightly in wonder. "Edward has a vehement spirit if I've ever seen one." I didn't doubt it. "I can take you to him, but I do not think you shall have such an easy time latching this one. Humans have little power over the dead."

I tried not to think too far into her words, failure was not an option. We floated down the river silently for some time before my curiosity got the best of me.

"Do you escort all souls over to the afterlife?" I asked her. She seemed amused by my human curiosity.

"Only those that are unsure of their paths," she replied.

"Why?" I questioned. "Why do you help others you don't even know?" She shrugged.

"I'm not sure." Something seemed to fall into place in my mind.

"Perhaps you're waiting for someone?" I suggested and from the longing on her face I knew I was right. The boat stopped.

"This is as far as I can take you," she said softly. I gazed gratefully into her kind eyes.

"Thank you," I said as sincerely as I could. "Claudia." Her face was questioning as I exited the boat, though she did not ask how I knew her name. She simply kept floating down the river, out of sight. I turned and headed towards the rocky shore, focusing on the task at hand.

As soon as my last foot left the water everything around me changed. I found myself standing on the edge of a field, surrounded by trees. It reminded me faintly of Edward's meadow where he had first declared his love for me, but there was something twisted about it. The bordering trees were knotted and dead, the long grass an unhealthy shade of yellow. The dark sky above was oppressing and I felt myself shuddering. I had barely taken two steps into the clearing when a voice cut through the silence like a knife. A voice I would recognize anywhere.

"Stop!" Edward's voice was rather harsh and I looked around anxiously for where it was coming from. Then I saw him. He was on the opposite side of the meadow, stepping out from the gnarled trees. Only, it wasn't the Edward I remembered.

He was still handsome, but the surreal beauty that had always held me entranced was gone. His eyes were a colorless grey and his hair laid dully against his head. He looked undeniably and unhealthily human.

"Edward!" I called, stepping forward again and I saw him visibly tense.

"Go away," he shouted, his voice no longer crystal smooth. "Stop haunting me." This stopped me, and I could only imagine what his obviously delusional mind was making him see.

"Edward, it's me," I tried to comfort him, all too aware of the time ticking by. I had no clue how long I had been dead for. "It's Bella." He waved his hand in front of him, as if he could wave me away like mist. I started to walk forward, more forcefully this time, and he backed away, almost as if in fear.

"Edward stop," I called before he could turn to run. "I'm not going to hurt you!" He stopped backing away, staring at me numbly.

"What do you want?" he asked, his voice hopeless. I reached his side; even without his vampire perfection I was hopelessly in love with him.

"I'm here to save you," I said, reaching for his arm, which he jerked away before I could touch it. "We don't have much time."

"You're not Bella." I hated the broken look of his features. It was strange, but suddenly it seemed as though I were the strong one, the one who had to pull us through this. "She promised me she would move on."

I closed my eyes in frustration. Stupid dead vampire, why did he have to take everything so literally? How could he have possibly believed I would move on after he died?

"I couldn't Edward," I tried to move in towards him again, only to have him take a step back. "I couldn't move on. That's why I'm here to bring you back." His dull eyes defiantly evaded mine.

"Why should I believe you this time?" his voice was bold, yet I could tell he wanted to believe. He wanted to, but wouldn't allow himself, just as I had before. "After you've led me in circles, taunting me, abandoning me? Why is this time any different?"

"I don't know what you saw before Edward, but I can assure you it is me this time. I need you to trust me," I pleaded desperately.

"Then you're dead," Edward still sounded rather doubtful. "If it truly is you, than you're as dead as me." Why was he being so difficult?

"Not really," I explained as quickly as I could. "My heart is simply stopped long enough for me to come and get you, that's why we have to hurry, I don't know how long I'll be here." Edward looked slightly baffled and I knew he wasn't going to be too happy with me stopping my heart in order to rescue him, but I figured I'd deal with that later.

This time when I reached forward to touch him, he didn't shy away. His skin felt rough and warm beneath my fingers, much like my own. I figured in his death he had somehow reverted back to his human form, though why Claudia had appeared as a vampire confused me. Perhaps it had something to do with their separate longings; Claudia was waiting for a vampire while Edward was waiting for a human. Whatever the reason, it didn't matter right now.

"Please believe me," I whispered, drawing him in close, tightly gripping the body I had never thought I would see again. Edward remained stiff, as if unsure I was real or not. I supposed it didn't matter whether he believed me or not, as long as we were touching when I was brought back.

What happened next was too fast for me to really understand. A hard force collided with my back, knocking me and Edward to the ground. I rolled over quickly, Edward springing to his feet again quickly, only to be knocked down again. A pale white hand reached down and yanked me to my feet forcefully.

"Thank you for all your help Bella," the sickeningly smooth voice made me cringe and I looked straight into a face I had hoped never to see again.

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_Does that count as a cliffhanger? Review and let me know what you think! My goal is to break 200 by the end of the story, so please review! I'll see you again on Tuesday!_


	13. Get out of my head

_Surprise! I'm posting this early because of all you wonderful reviewers! Seriously, you really made my day with all your wonderful feedback. I keep smiling ridiculously every time I look at the computer, I think my family thinks I'm going senial. Oh well!_

_Anyways, I was really pleased with all of your guesses, I guess I wasn't as tricky as I thought I was. You wcan't believe how happy I am with the feedback for this story, this has seriously been one of the highlights of the year so far (other than seeing Pink Floyd in concert!!!) _

_Only two chapters after this one:( But I am working on a sequel right now, so hopefully I can begin posting relatively soon after the end of this story. Anyways, enough talking...Enjoy!_

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"James," my voice echoed harshly in my ears. He smiled sadistically.

"It's ok Bella," he mocked. "You don't have to pretend anymore." My mouth dropped as I realized what he was doing. Edward looked back and forth between us, hurt apparent on his face, than anger.

"Go away," the fury in his voice was like a dagger in my heart. James face fell into false pity.

"Oh, did poor Edward fall for it again?" James wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me in close. I tried to push away from him, from this hateful vampire, but he was too strong.

"Don't listen to him Edward," I shouted, struggling against James. Edward shook his head in disgust.

"Please don't do this to me anymore," my angel was looking directly at James and I assumed this wasn't the first time he'd visited. "You've exacted your revenge. Just leave me alone."

"What do you think Gwen," James drew the name out long and slow. "Should we leave Edward in his misery? I was just starting to have fun." I narrowed my eyes and glared at him as fiercely as I could.

"Don't call me that," my voice dripped with hate. "My name is Isabella Swan and you will let go of me this instant." I was impressed with how commanding my voice was. If only I could do that around Charlie.

"So you do want to keep playing," James sounded gleeful. "How pleasant."

I was about to spit on him when a strange sensation came over me. I felt as light as the air, like my body was trying to float into the dark sky above. Then a sharp pain compressed my chest, as if someone were hitting me with incredible force. No! They couldn't be reviving me yet, I needed more time.

Unable to think of anything else to do, I turned so my body was pressed against James, fighting the pulling sensation with all my will. He slackened slightly in shock as I gently wrapped my arms around his neck, enticing him closer still. Then, with as much force as I could, I lifted my knee, hitting him hard between the legs. Whether it truly hurt him or not I don't know, but it was enough for him to release him grip on my slightly and I dove out of his reach. Edward had begun walking dejectedly out of the meadow, his shoulders slumped in defeat.

I shouted to him and he stopped, looking over his shoulder at me as I sprinted towards him. The pull on my chest was starting to get too strong and the world around me was beginning to blur, all the colors mixing together like a paint palate. I reached my arms out in front of me, willing myself to reach him before it was too late. The fabric of his shirt barely touched my fingers when the pull became too much and I felt myself falling into the sky.

Air rushed into my lungs, burning my throat. My head pounded as I rolled to my side, coughing harshly, sucking in oxygen as deeply as I could. Shakily I tried to calm myself, blinking my eyes to clear my swarming vision. Once I felt steady enough, I looked around, surprised to find myself alone. I was on the ground beside Edward's coffin, the same spot Marcus had been standing only moments earlier. Only, he was nowhere to be seen.

Grabbing the edges of the sleek, black coffin I hoisted myself to my feet, my legs shakily protesting. Apparently being dead really messes with your body. As I looked down onto the white satin bed, all thoughts of my aching body were wiped from my head and I could only blink in shock.

It was empty. Edward's body, dead or alive, was gone. I felt like screaming. Things were happening too fast for my exhausted state and I was tired of not knowing. I was tired of everything. All desire to do anything fled my body and I slumped to the ground again, leaning my back against the coffin. Truthfully, at this moment I no longer cared was happened. I didn't want to deal with anything any longer. Someone probably could have pointed a gun at my head right now and I wouldn't have even blinked.

Distantly I heard someone shouting my name. It was Alice. She was quickly beside me, taking in the surroundings in obvious distress. Esme and Ryan stepped into my peripheral vision but I paid them no mind. I simply remained still, staring at the deep hole dug just a few feet away from where I sat. Alice took my limp hands in her own.

"Oh Bella," her voice was full of pain. "What did you do?" I raised my head and stared into her stunning amber eyes. No other emotions filled them but concern. Concern for me. I knew she would do anything to help me overcome this.

"He's gone," my voice cracked and Alice's face dropped in confusion, though I wasn't sure if it was because of what I said or just the fact that I actually said something.

"What?" she asked. I motioned to the coffin even though I knew I wasn't making any sense.

"Edward's gone," my voice fell and I dropped my gaze back down to the empty grave. Alice lithely rose to her feet and stared dumbfounded into the coffin. I heard Esme gasp in shock.

"What happened?" she asked faintly. I shook my head, my dark hair cascading around my face.

"I don't know," I replied and it was the truth. I really was unsure of everything that had just happened. It seemed to be jumbled in my mind, all too unbelievable to be real. Ryan had started looking around the cemetery urgently, as if expecting to see something. I knew he wouldn't. Somehow I knew that Marcus and Edward's body were far away.

An odd tingling sensation in my fingers made me shake my hands in annoyance. They felt like they were falling asleep, hundreds of tiny pins and needles jabbing me all over. I supposed it was just a side effect of being dead. The air was cool and I shivered.

"We need to get her home," Esme's voice was low in Alice's ear. "I think she may be in shock." Alice nodded in agreement. She extended a tiny, but strong hand and I accepted it, nearly jerking back as a shock passed through us. Alice kept her hand firmly on mine however and gently picked me up. It was amazing someone as small as her could hide such strength. I shut my eyes firmly when I realized they had not taken a car to the cemetery.

It wasn't until we were nearly back to their house, Alice's gentle loping calming, though not as graceful as Marcus's, that I realized my hands no longer tingled, though I wasn't too perturbed by it. It simply gave me something to think about other than what had just happened.

When I felt Alice slowing to a more human pace I figured it was safe for me to open my eyes without becoming nauseous. We were in the Cullen's long driveway, approaching the large white house and a very anxious looking Jasper.

Alice lithely set me on my feet, keeping one hand on me until I could steady myself. Jasper approached quickly, but stopped a few feet before Alice, a confused expression changing his face. His amber eyes were fixed on Alice as if she had just sprouted another limb.

"Alice?" his voice was questioning, careful. "What's wrong?" My eyes drifted to her face, slightly confused. Why did Jasper seem so troubled?

"Why nothing dearest," Alice replied smoothly. Since when did she say dearest? As I looked at her I notice something different, her head was tilted at an unfamiliar angle, her shoulders held a little too high. Jasper frowned, I guessed from his baffled expression he was sensing an emotion from her that didn't correlate with her seeming positive demeanor.

A slight rustling in the surrounding trees averted my attention and I felt my anger rise as Marcus glided into view. His face was hard and I hated him in that instant. I hated him for leaving me in the cemetery, for causing me hope only to have it unbearable crushed.

Behind me Esme gave out a startled noise and Jasper's face went limp in shock. I supposed it wasn't everyday one of the Volturi showed up at your front door. My teeth gritted in an effort to not yell at him. There was a sense of urgency in his eyes that kept me from speaking once my anger had subsided slightly.

"Isabella, step away quickly," his voice was calm but fiercely commanding. My eyebrows met in confusion. That really wasn't what I had been expecting to hear.

"Isabella, get away from Alice," Marcus repeated. I didn't even have time to tell him he was crazy when Alice's thin arms grabbed me roughly, twisting me into a dizzying chokehold. I pulled at her arms, but her grip was like iron. Jasper stepped towards her questioningly, but her arm tightened around my throat threateningly and I gasped for breath.

"Alice?" Jasper gazed at his wife in wonder.

"I believe you have me mistaken for someone else." Alice's chest vibrated with speech, but the voice was not her own. It was James.

I struggled again with renewed vigor when I realized what had happened. Alice, though I suppose it really was James, tightened the arm around my neck until I could barely suck in any air at all. My vision began to swim as my lungs burned for oxygen. James loosened his grip slightly before I could pass out.

"Release her James," Marcus's voice was so powerful that only a fool wouldn't obey him. A fool like James. He laughed slightly hysterically, shaking Alice's head.

"Why would I do that?" he asked, Alice's dainty arm jerking me roughly. "This…human…cause my death!" I could see Jasper grasping his hands nervously, wanting to do something, but afraid his actions could cause me harm.

"This human," Marcus, though still calm, sounded rather mocking "has much appeal to the Volturi. Unlike yourself, she will make an extremely gifted vampire, and it would be a great disappointment to us if she were killed." Marcus's works reverberated in my mind. Had he not come to bring Edward back because he couldn't stand my pain? Was it because the Volturi were afraid I would die of grief before I could be changed? My anger at Marcus flared up again at this deceit.

"I don't care!" James's voice shouted from Alice's mouth. "Nothing ever escapes my hunt! Ever!" Marcus crossed on hand over the other.

"We do not suffer well to be disappointed," Marcus said coolly. Alice's face twisted into a sneer and a taunting growl built in her throat. I felt her soft lips against my skin of my neck, the hardness of her razor teeth, and I whimpered fearfully, bracing myself for the pain that was sure to come next. Only it never came.

Instead something heavy and solid collided with Alice's body and I was knocked to the ground. Strong hands rolled me onto my back and I found myself staring into smoldering black eyes. Eyes that take my breath away and capture my soul. My angel.

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_Ok, now this can't possibly be a cliffhanger...although as you all know I am a horrible judge at that. It's not for me though! Review!_


	14. Not quite right

_Alrighty, here it is, the second to last chapter. I really have had fun reading all your reviews for the past few chapters, you guys are so amusing. Anyways, don't really have much to tell you, except to be thankful that I love Edward enough to bring him back;)_

_Happy 4th of July!_

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Edward's face was unreadable, an angelic veneer of calm. I couldn't move, couldn't breathe. I could barely convince myself of what I was seeing. Was it really him or had my brain finally snapped and I was seeing things?

Alice's jeering face appeared behind Edward's shoulder and he was ripped forcefully off of me. Esme was immediately by my side, pulling me to away from the angry vampires. Her motherly voice was asking if I was ok and I felt my head nodding an automatic reply. My attention was too transfixed by the scene playing out before me.

James had pulled Edward to the ground, baring gleaming white teeth; however, Alice's small frame was no match for Edward's bulk and he managed to flip her beneath him, reversing their positions. A terrifying snarl ripped from Alice's throat and her powerful legs kicked Edward off, sending him flying into the side of my seemingly forever parked yellow Lamborghini.

Edward shook his head quickly, perhaps stunned with the force behind James's kick. James's was quickly on Alice's feet, approaching Edward menacingly. He didn't make it too far before both Jasper and Ryan had thrown themselves onto him, knocking him to the ground and holding him there. Alice's small frame thrashed violently, frightening animal noises ripping from her throat.

Edward had regained his bearings, and was staring at Marcus, his black eyes liquid pools of hate. I wondered if he knew what had happened when he was dead. I supposed he could have pieced together the majority of it from what he had read in everyone's minds. Marcus met Edward's glare, his face unchanging.

"Help her!" Edward commanded of Marcus, who seemed oblivious to Alice's struggle.

"There is nothing we can do," he replied. "She has to fight him out herself." Edward's white fists clenched tightly, as if containing himself from springing on the ancient vampire. I silently willed him to control himself, to tend to Alice. My wishes were answered and in the blink of an eye he was by Alice's side, her body shaking violently. Jasper's voice could be heard above her snarls and shouts, begging her to fight him, to overcome the intruder in her body. Her hands pulled at her dark hair as if in pain.

"You're stronger than him Alice," Edward's angelic voice quietly reassured her. "He is nothing compared to you." Her eyes snapped open, a deep crimson red, and her face contorted into a hateful snarl.

"Leave her James," Jasper's voice was frightening. "This is not your body to inhabit." Alice's eyes blinked and they were back to their normal vibrant ocher. Suddenly she sat up, knocking Jasper slightly backwards, and her mouth opened in an unearthly scream. My hands immediately covered my ears, though even with the protection my eardrums still felt as if they were shattering. I was sure everyone in the state of Washington could hear her scream.

I felt a hand grip my shoulder and immediately the noise stopped, though Alice's mouth was still wide with her agony. My head tilted up into Ryan's red eyes and I stared at him in wonder. He must've been blocking my sense of sound, though his concern slightly confused me. What did he care if I went deaf? Wasn't I just a weak little human?

His hand left my shoulder and he stepped slightly away as Alice suddenly collapsed into Jasper's arms, sobbing dryly. James was gone. He stroked her hair briskly, trying to calm her and eventually her sobs stop. Still encased in Jasper's embrace she turned her head to the side, her eyes staring in dumb shock at Edward. Esme knelt down beside me, her face paling more than it already was, her eyes swimming with unshedable tears.

Edward, however, was looking at none of us, his gaze again locked onto Marcus. From the guarded, yet slightly perplexed look on his face, I guessed that Edward understood very little of what had just happened. Marcus's lips turned up into the hint of a smile as he glided a few steps towards me. His long arm rose and motioned gracefully for Ryan to join him, and the strange vampire was immediately by his side.

In an instant my gaze was captured by Marcus's consuming scarlet eyes, and I was no longer sure what I felt for the Volturi. Though his gaze was hard, it was also kind, like he was truly sincere about my happiness. But I couldn't forget what I had heard him tell James. That my change to vampirism was greatly anticipated.

Marcus nodded towards me, still not breaking contact with my eyes. I don't think I could have looked away if my life had depended on it.

"It was all true," his smooth voice was sincere. "All of it." I suddenly had the urge to tell him about Claudia, to tell him not to give up on his own love, but Marcus's eyes did not allow me to speak. Edward started to say something but was cut off by the Volturi's raised hand.

"Remember your promise," he said slowly before breaking our gaze. My eyes fell to the ground and when I looked back up he was gone.

Nobody spoke, perhaps too amazed and afraid to say anything. I leaned limply into Esme's arms; despite everything that had just happened I still had no will to move. A loud noise drew everyone's attention and the headlights of Carlisle's Mercedes shone brightly as he pulled into the driveway. The door swung open and Carlisle stepped out, not even bothering to turn it off. His face was blank in astonishment; his eyes flickered to Alice and Jasper before locking unwaveringly on Edward. Edward stood, unsure of what to do, his own ivory eyes faltering between Carlisle and I.

"How…" Carlisle's voice was soft and unbelieving. He stepped forward, his hands reaching to touch Edward's face, as if to make sure he was not simply a phantom. Edward's mouth opened, as if to say something, but then shut again, words failing to escape.

"I need to hunt," he said finally, after an unbearable pause. Carlisle nodded and Edward disappeared into the trees. I suspected he needed some time to gather his own thoughts, to try and understand what had just happened. Plus, it had been over two months since Edward had last drunk, his self-control was probably at the lowest point it had been in for a very long time.

Once he was gone Carlisle looked to me questioningly, but I couldn't bring myself to meet his gaze, none-the-less answer any impending questions. I was saved from speaking by a soft moan from Alice. She was rubbing her temples, her eyes clutched tightly shut. Jasper held her tightly, comforting her in a voice to low for my human ears. Esme stood up from my side, and both she and Carlisle made their way to Alice's side.

"What happened?" Carlisle questioned, concerned. Esme shook her head.

"I'm not sure," she replied. "Alice had a vision of Bella in the cemetery, dead. When we got there, she was alive, but when we brought her back here…I'm not sure exactly what happened, but somehow James came back." Carlisle's head whipped towards her in surprise.

"James?" he repeated. Alice groaned again and Carlisle redirected his attention back to her. "Come, let's get her inside. You can explain the rest to me then." Jasper helped Alice to her feet and led her inside. Esme and Carlisle turned back towards me, their kind faces asking if I needed any help. I shook my head and they seemed to understand I wanted some time to myself.

Once the front door had shut behind Carlisle I rose to my feet, brushing the dirt from my pants. The full moon was high in the sky, its crisp blue light illuminating the yard around me brilliantly. The peacefulness of the moment seemed odd after the struggle that had just taken place. I inhaled deeply and decided to make my way around to the back.

The backyard was just as beautiful as the front; Esme's stunning flowers setting an ethereal mood to the area and the faint gurgle of the river calming the ears. I sat down on the steps leading up to the back porch. Vaguely I wondered why I hadn't used this porch more often; there couldn't be a more beautiful place to spend the evening in all of Forks.

Resting my head in my hands, my thoughts began to drift back to Edward. My lack of emotion startled me. Shouldn't I be feeling ecstatic and overjoyed? Shouldn't I be rushing after him through the woods, begging him to take me in his arms, to never let me go? All sense told me yes, that is exactly what I should be doing, yet here I was. I couldn't explain what I was feeling; they weren't emotions that could easily be put into words.

The past two months Edward had been dead. I had never expected to see him again, ever. My mind had been stuck on that fact, rendering me incapable of leading any form of normal life. My heart had been ripped from me, the wound slowly bleeding me to death. Now it seemed as if the jagged edges had been cauterized, yet the hole was still there. My heart was still gone. I couldn't expect my emotions to be like elastic, to be stretched for so long only to snap back in an instant. They were more like hard clay, molded and pressed out of shape which only a skilled artist was capable of turning into something beautiful.

I sat like this for several hours, sometimes thinking, but mostly just staring blankly into the forest that bordered the yard. The sky had begun to lighten, hopeful rays of sun endeavoring to pierce the quickly forming clouds. I became aware of the house behind me for the first time that night, the open windows allowing me to hear what I had previously been oblivious too.

I could hear the front door opening and closing and all other movements becoming still. I knew Edward had returned, and I heard Esme whispering his name, her mouth most likely embracing the movements she had never believed to form again. Carlisle spoke next, though I couldn't quite make out his words, he was speaking to low for my ears.

"How is she?" I heard Edward's silky voice and I assumed they were talking about Alice. Carlisle replied something inaudible. I wished he would speak a little louder. My wish was granted with his next question.

"How is this possible?" The floorboards creaked as someone moved through the house. I could imagine the perplexed look that must be on Edward's face, his coppery hair ruffling as he shakes his head slightly.

"I don't know," he replied, and paused, as if something were missing. "Where is Bella?" The brief silence that followed the question almost made me think they were going to say I was dead. Perhaps I was.

"She's out back," I heard Esme gently answer. The floor creaked again as he undoubtedly made his way towards the back door. Something must have stopped him before he could open in however and Jasper's voice came not from the open windows, but through the wood door.

"Edward," Jasper's voice was thick with concern. "There is something not right…her emotions…" he trailed off, probably as unable to describe what I was feeling as I was. Edward replied something quietly before the door opened and I heard him step onto the porch.

I couldn't bring myself to turn and face him. My body stayed as still as stone as I stared forward, my gaze locked on a large grey rock artistically placed in the garden. My heart sped up slightly as he took as seat beside me, but I still couldn't look at him. Truthfully, I was afraid. I was scared to see his face, the beautiful visage I had painfully dreamed about so many awful nights; scared my heart would mend only to be ripped apart yet again. No matter how caring any of the Cullens were, I wouldn't be able to survive any more pain like this.

He sat quietly beside me for a while, his own eyes wandering aimlessly before eventually locking onto my face. I didn't even have to see his face clearly to know the heartbroken expression he was wearing.

"Bella," the voice I had only dreamed of hearing again broke through the silence. I closed my eyes tightly for a few seconds, willing myself to feel something, the feel the passion I should rightfully be experiencing. Somehow I had thought that bringing Edward back would put everything right again, set it back to how it had been before. Now I realized how absurd that was. I had been numb to long go back. Silently I wished he wouldn't speak anymore. I really didn't want to have to explain anything.

"Please look at me," he sounded more desperate than anything else. I didn't. I kept staring at the grey rock, unable to avert my gaze. Icy fingers gently wrapped around my chin and I didn't resist as Edward turned my face towards his. Deep ocher eyes locked on my own dull spheres. I knew I looked pathetic but I didn't care.

"Oh Bella," Edward's voice was sad. "What happened to you?" For the first time ever, I broke Edward's entrancing gaze and looked down, slightly ashamed. I was ashamed that I hadn't been able to keep my promise to him; that I had fallen into such deep despair. Tears blurred my vision and fell silently onto my cheeks. I didn't know what to say, or if there was even anything to be said. I didn't think anything could put this right.

Edward sighed and wrapped his arms around me. I fell limply into his embrace. Quietly he hummed my lullaby, the tune I had tried so desperately to block from my mind for the past nine weeks. The song brought back a fresh wave of emotions, and I shivered slightly as they worked their way through my body. Edward held me tightly, a silent promise to never let me go. After a while the humming faded away and I could tell he desperately wanted to ask me about what had happened.

"How did you do it?" Edward finally questioned and I broke from his embrace, sitting upright again. "How did you find me?" I wrung my hands together nervously, wondering if there was any way I could say this without him getting upset. Probably not. Besides, there really was no point of trying to hide anything, he would find out sooner or later.

"Marcus came to me," I said quietly, avoiding Edward's probing gaze. "He said he wanted to help, that your death would destroy the family. He claimed that your family is an important part of the vampire community." I decided to leave out the personal aspect, unsure of how Edward would react to it. I also avoided the part about my agreement to become a vampire; there would be time to explain that later.

"He wanted to help me bring you back," I continued, slightly amazed at how easy it was to say all this. Maybe I was rather desensitized. "We dug you up and he temporarily killed me…" I trailed off as I realized what I was saying. Edward was going to be extremely happy.

"He killed you?" his voice was strained and his vibrant eyes shown fiercely. I nodded.

"Only temporarily," I tried to explain but I could tell there was nothing I could say that would ease his distress. "It was the only way to bring you back!" Why was I getting frustrated? This was how Edward always reacted to anything that might endanger me.

"You shouldn't have done this," Edward's voice was conflicted. Suddenly I felt my anger flare up in me, irrationally. After all I had been through, all the pain I had suffered with his death, he tells me I shouldn't have saved him? I sprung to my feet, facing him angrily, shoving my sleeves to my elbows, baring the scars on my arms.

"Do you see what I've done to myself?" I screamed and Edward looked taken aback, unsure of how to react. His eyes filled with horror as he realized what I was showing him. "I didn't care if I died! Anything was better than this hell!" I stopped, shaking from my outburst. Part of me was ashamed at what I had just said, but a different part of me was relieved at finally letting my anger loose. All movement inside the house had gone silent; I knew they could hear everything quite clearly. Edward's eyes searched my face devastatingly; I couldn't stand it.

Turning on my heels I fled, running into the forest as fast as my legs could take me. Of course, it wasn't long until I tripped, falling flat on my face. Edward's strong hands wrapped around my arms and he helped me to my feet. His fingers encircled my wrists, delicately avoiding the shameful scars.

"I'm alive," he whispered, pulling me in close. "You don't have to hurt anymore."

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_Ok, so this can't possibly be a cliffhanger. There are no unknown voices or once dead faces. Please review and let me know what you think! See you all Friday!_


	15. An Ending

_Alrighty, are you ready for this? The very last chapter?? I can't believe this story has gone by so quickly! A million and more thanks to all my wonderful readers! I have enjoyed reading your reviews more than you can possibly imagine! It has seriously been one of the highlights of my summer. Thank you so much!_

_Ok, so I have a few things to say before we get to the story. I want to thank again my beta reader, Mysticstar, for being so wonderful. She has gone above and beyond her beta-readerness and has helped me to plan out the sequel. Speaking of sequel, that is my next point. I am currently working on a sequel to this story, which should involve just about as much Edward angst as this one (I just couldn't help it!), and I plan on getting more in touch with the other characters of the story. Bella is fun to write, but I want to try something different. So, if you want to read the sequel (and I encourage everyone to!) thank put me on your author alert. Otherwise I suppose you could just look for it, it will be called Hot as Ice, but I'm not sure when I shall begin to post it. Hopefully within the next week or two._

_Also, some people seem to be confused about Alice, so I am going to take a moment to explain. Alice is completely fine. James was touching Bella's shirt when she was brought back so his soul was inside her. However, since Bella happens to be very much human, he couldn't take over her and so when she touched Alice he was transferred into her body instead (the tingling in Bella's fingers). He wanted to take over Alice's body, so he tried to 'push' her mind from her body, but unfortunately for him Alice was stronger and managed to push him out of her body. No harm was done to her. Does that make sense?_

_Alrighty, enough said. Although Bella still has some emotions to work through...Enjoy!_

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Alive. The word seemed unreal in my ear. Yet there was undeniable proof before me. Edward was alive. I wanted so much just to hold him, to believe his words, but my anger wasn't so easily abated. It was anger at myself mainly, all my emotions transforming into the easiest form of expression. I was just sorry this fury was to be directed at my love, whom I'd barely even dreamed of seeing again. I jerked out of his grip, the wound in my chest firing up painfully as I did. I wrapped an arm around it tightly, trying to keep all my bloody emotions from spilling into plain sight.

"It's too late!" I shouted. "I died when you died! I can't feel anything anymore!" If Edward was upset by my shouting he did not show it. His perfect face remained calm and soothing, his eyes full of love. He tried to step forward to me again, but I stepped quickly away. How I wanted to fall into his embrace, but I couldn't. Not after what I'd just said.

"You do feel Bella," Edward replied smoothly. "You're feeling right now." I stared at the ground, slightly out of breath, unsure of how to reply. Everything Edward was saying was true. I was just too stubborn to believe it. I felt cold hands wrap around my shoulders and this time I gave up. I didn't resist.

"Please," Edward's voice was insistent in my ears. "Don't be angry anymore. I know what you're going through, believe me, I have experienced it far too many times myself. Sometimes it seems that anger is the safest way, everything else hurts more. But trust me, things will get better. I promise."

Edward's words mulled over in my brain, flaring the pain in my chest sharply. I realized how ridiculous I was being; what was I afraid of? Could anything possibly hurt more than what I'd been through in the past two months? Especially now that Edward was alive again. I looked up into warm topaz eyes, surrendering my soul to him.

"I'm sorry," I barely whispered, tears tracing lines down my cheeks. Edward pulled me in tight and I rested my head on his shoulder, my body vibrating from sobs.

"Don't be," Edward whispered in my ear, his gentle breath slightly stirring my hair. "You have done nothing wrong."

We remained like this for a long time. I knew things weren't back to normal yet, but we had taken a small step in that direction. Eventually, when the sun was high in the dripping sky, I drew away from Edward's embrace, though I desperately wanted to just stay there forever.

"We should be getting back," I mumbled, not wanting to share my Edward with anyone else right now. "I'm sure the others are dying to see you." Edward smiled slightly, his eyes never leaving my face.

"We can let them wait just a little longer," Edward replied, pulling me in close again and pressing his smooth, perfect lips to my own. I nearly fainted with the perfectness of the kiss, and the passion. I desperately wanted more, to go deeper and farther than ever before, but I knew it was impossible. So long as I was human, we could never really get what either of us wanted. I was reminded of my promise to the Volturi; I decided to keep that hidden for now, there would be a better time for such information.

Once Edward had relinquished his lips from mine he grasped my hand tightly and we headed back towards his home. I wasn't quite sure of how to act, it had been so long since I had been anywhere near a normal girl. Thankfully, the Cullens seemed to understand what I was going through and merely insisted that I go up to bed and get some much needed rest. I knew they wanted me to recover before they started asking questions.

Before I started up the stairs I was pleased to see Alice, sitting on the couch, looking as perky as ever. I suddenly felt incredibly selfish, all I had done was mope about my own sorry emotions, when the others had been affected just as bad as I was, if not worse. My mouth had barely opened to ask her how she was feeling when she lithely jumped to her feet and wrapped me into a firm hug.

"It's not your fault Bella," she assured me. "I'm perfectly fine." I squeezed her back tightly, desperately willing the tears to stay in my eyes, where they belonged.

"Thank you Alice," I whispered to her. The gratefulness and love that I felt towards the tiny vampire couldn't even begin to be expressed in words. I very much doubted I would have survived the past two months if it hadn't been for her. Reluctantly I let her go and headed up the winding stairs.

Edward remained downstairs for a few minutes while I showered, relishing in the lack of supervision that had seemed to become a necessity for me. Faintly I wondered what they were telling Edward, although I suspected it was about me. I hated being treated like a china doll about the break, but I suppose I deserved it.

I had just finished dressing myself when I saw it. My little orange pill container. I had thought it was down in the kitchen, but apparently someone had moved it up here into the bathroom. I paused, just staring at it, before slowly reaching and gripping the cold plastic in my palm. I stood contemplating before ripping off the cap and dumping the chalky white pills into the toilet. Then I tossed the empty bottle into the trash and exited the bathroom.

Edward was waiting for me in the hallway and I had almost reached him before I stopped, realizing where we were going. Edward's closed door loomed before me and I grimaced knowing what was behind it. Edward wrapped an arm around me comfortingly.

"What is it?" he asked, easily deciphering my horrified expression. How could I explain what I had done? How could I tell him that I had destroyed everything he owns? I swallowed thickly, unable to find my voice. Mentally I was beating myself for being so stupid. I hoped he wouldn't be too angry.

"Come on, you need some sleep," Edward said gently once it was apparent I wasn't going to reply. He tried to lead me forward, but my feet seemed to be glued to the floor, my eyes brooding at the door. Suddenly he seemed to understand, looking back and forth from me to the entrance of his room. Walking forward on his own he pushed open the door and paused at the sight before him. I looked down, embarrassed, before steeling myself enough to step behind him.

"I was upset," I tried to explain, not wanting to see the angry expression that was bound to be upsetting Edward's face. To my great surprise he started laughing. I stared at him like he was mental and my absurd expression caused him to chuckle even harder. Stepping into the rather torn up room, he glanced around as if amused before turning back to me.

"I guess we will have to find a different room for now," he chuckled. A surprised exclamation behind me caused both of us to turn around. Alice and Jasper were standing in the doorway looking slightly shocked. My cheeks grew hot and I knew I was blushing tomato red.

"Wow," Alice exclaimed, sliding past Jasper into the room. She nodded to me. "You were certainly busy Bella." I blushed even harder, if that was possible. Edward waved it off.

"No matter," he said offhand, as if his destroyed room was no worse than a hangnail. "We can stay in Emmett and Rosalie's room." I could hear Jasper laughing lightly as we exited, probably amusing himself with what Rosalie would say if she came back to find us in her well marked territory.

Unlike Edward's room, Emmett and Rosalie happened to have a very beautifully carved bed, though I tried not to imagine what it was put to use for. Edward scooped me into his arms and for once I didn't protest. Gently he laid me on the heavily cushioned bed and for a second I thought it might swallow me.

Darkness embraced me as Edward shut the window curtains and I embraced it back. Everything seemed so much simpler in the dark. The bed shook slightly as Edward gracefully climbed on next to me, a cold hand lightly stroking my hair. A great fatigue came over me then but I felt as if things had been left unsaid.

"Edward," I whispered, stifling a yawn. It felt good to say his name and know that he was listening. "I'm sorry I was angry."

"Bella…" Edward started to refute my apology but I cut him off.

"And I'm sorry for destroying your room." His fingers traced the lines of my cheeks and I shivered in delight.

"I love you," Edward voice was warm in my ear. "Nothing can change that, no matter how angry you are or how many of my affects you destroy." I snuggled in closer to him, allowing his scent to penetrate every fiber of my being.

"Now sleep." His words seemed to take a magical hold on my body and I instantly obeyed.

I dreamed, but nothing significant for me to remember, which was a pleasant change. Anything was better than seeing Edward die over and over again every night.

When I finally awoke at first I believed it to be night. Then I saw a bright ray of sun peeking its way through a crack between the curtains. Groggily I rubbed my eyes, struggling to remember where I was. As I looked to my side and saw Edward's godlike face everything came back to me in one big rush. His lips curled up into an unfairly attractive smile when he realized I was awake.

"Good morning," his voice made my heart skip a beat. Blinking the last sleep from my eyes I pushed myself onto my elbows.

"How long was I asleep?" I asked my angel.

"Three days," he replied and I frowned. I must've been really tired.

"Bella…" Edward's voice was hesitant and I had a pretty good idea of what he was about to ask. After three days of waiting I'm sure he was going crazy from wonder. "What promise did you make Marcus?" I inhaled deeply, trying to deduce the best way to break this to Edward, although I guessed he was fairly certain of what that was.

"Edward, please don't be angry at me," I started and he pushed himself into a sitting position, crossing his underneath him like a pretzel. "I was desperate, I would've done anything to get you back. I couldn't stand hurting anymore…" Edward wrapped his cold fingers around mine as I frantically tried to explain myself.

"I know," he reassured. "I understand. Just tell me." I looked down at my blanketed toes, wiggling them nervously.

"I promised I would be a vampire by the end of the year." In an instant Edward was on his feet, pale hands running through his messy hair. I bit my lip, hating the knowledge of how upset Edward was, how this contradicted everything he had hoped for me. He walked in a circle before throwing open the curtains and gazing distantly into the light.

"I'm sorry Edward," I rose from the cushioned bed and made my way to his side. "There was no other way; I couldn't pass up the chance to get you back." Edward said nothing and remained staring out the window, deep in thought. This was extremely frustrating.

"Please don't be mad," I pleaded, knowing it was too late already. I would probably have better luck convincing a stone wall to tell me the weather forecast. Finally Edward turned and looked at me, his eyes deeply conflicted.

"I am not mad at you," he said before glancing out the window again. "Merely at the situation." I could see his grip tighten on the curtain. His next words were a mumble, said simply as an afterthought: "There has to be some way…" I flung up my arms in frustration.

"Why?" I asked forcefully. "Why can't you accept that I'm meant to be a vampire? That I want to be a vampire? Why does changing me scare you so much?" When Edward looked at me next, his eyes were filled with such sadness I thought I would start crying, though I did not know why. My hands blindly found his, my eyes never leaving his face for a second.

"I don't know how to best explain this to you," Edward's brow furrowed as he searched for the right words. "So please try to understand. For almost a century I have lived this undead life, and everyday of it I have hated who I am, what I have become. Until I met you, there wasn't a second that went by when I wasn't unhappy. Every time I look at you I am reminded of the beauty and meaning of human life. I can't take that from you for my empty existence. I can't damn you to this conscious death."

For a while I was speechless. Was this really how Edward viewed his existence? As a damnation? I sighed, wondering how to make him see how beautiful his life truly was.

"Edward," I began even though I knew this was a lost cause. I still had to get in my two cents worth. "Look at Carlisle and Esme. Jasper and Alice. Rosalie and Emmett. Do you think they are damned to an empty existence?" Edward broke his hands away from mine and rubbed them anxiously behind his neck before turning to the bed. I followed him persistently.

"I believe you were unhappy, that you didn't understand the reason for your existence. But you've found it now, in me."

"Bella…" Edward tried to refute me. Why was he such a stubborn prick sometimes? "You don't understand…" I glared at him as harshly as my love for this block-headed vampire would let me.

"I think I understand better than you give me credit for," I bit back and Edward's eyebrows rose in surprise at my tenacity. "Perhaps there was a reason you were changed. We were born nearly one hundred years apart, yet here we are, together. Perhaps Carlisle was compelled to change you because somehow, though he may not have been conscious of it, he knew that you would find me. That we were meant to be together, forever." Edward's eyes took me in thoughtfully, slightly surprised.

"I love you Bella," he said slowly and I drank in the words greedily. "But I can't. I just can't." I closed my eyes, willing my anger and sadness away. I knew perfectly well that this was a struggle inside Edward, but that still didn't stop it from hurting me. Edward truly didn't want to turn me into a vampire. When I reopened my eyes Edward looked slightly ashamed of the grief he was causing me.

"Edward, I want what the others have. I want to be with you forever," I lightly touched Edward's arm, trying to make him understand my meaning. "Truly with you. No boundaries." Edward remained silent, struggling inside himself. I knew he wanted it as well, to be able to kiss me, touch me, without having to hold himself back.

"Is this what you truly want?" Edward asked. "You would give up your entire life to be with me?"

"In a heartbeat," I replied quickly. Could I actually be convincing him? He certainly didn't look too happy about it all.

"Give me some time," his voice was quiet and pensive, his caramel eyes pleaded with mine. I nodded, but was spared answering by an impatient knocking on the door

"I don't care," I heard Rosalie arguing with someone. "It's our room and I am not being barricaded out of it!" My face broke into a wide grin and Edward chuckled noiselessly.

"Bella, let me in!" she yelled through the closed door, at least respecting our privacy enough not just barge in. Although, I wouldn't really put it past her. Edward quietly made his way to the door and swung it open. Rosalie froze in mid-shout, blinking dumbly at Edward. Than quicker than my eyes could follow she jumped on him, her arms encasing him tightly.

"Edward!" she screamed and held him at arm's length her eyes devouring his face. "They said…I couldn't believe…holy shit!" I snorted at the last one. Rosalie's unquenchable energy never failed to amaze me. Suddenly she released Edward and ran to me, lifting me off my feet in a hug that I was sure would break my ribs.

"Thank you for saving my brother," her warmth towards me was strange and I wasn't quite sure how to react.

"Rosalie," I gasped. "Can't breathe." She set me down and patted my head apologetically and I suddenly felt like a small puppy being rewarded or something ridiculous like that. It wasn't fair how this beautiful creature before me could do that.

"Sorry," she offered. "It's just…this is all too incredible!" Suddenly the blonde vampiress turned on her brother, jabbing a finger menacingly into his chest.

"Don't ever do that again!" She threatened and shuddered. "I don't ever want to relive that hell." Edward smiled and embraced his sister tightly.

"You don't have to worry," Edward replied softly, though his eyes were glued on me. "I'm here to stay."

Rosalie broke out of Edward's grip, looking around as if something were missing.

"Where's that mutton-headed husband of mine?" she exclaimed and swiftly exited the room, calling Emmett's name in a voice I couldn't imagine him refusing. Less than thirty seconds later Emmett was gaping dumbly in the doorway; his expression remarkably similar to Rosalie's when she had first seen Edward. I couldn't help but giggle – it was amazing how comparable they were.

"Edward," he breathed. "How is this possible?" Edward smiled and nodded his head in my direction.

"You better ask her," he replied and I felt my cheeks growing red as all attention was directed at me. I glared at Edward who shrugged his shoulders innocently.

"Bella brought you back?" Emmett sounded as if this were all too much to process. Rosalie slapped her husband lightly on the shoulder.

"Did you have your head up your ass the whole trip here?" she asked him and Emmett looked rather lost and confused. "What did I tell you?" He looked at her, a slightly abashed smile on his face.

"You were talking?" he asked hesitantly and her hand smacked his arm again and he rubbed it sorely.

"Hey, break it up," Edward warned, rather amused. He turned back to look at me with his breathtaking amber eyes. I felt for sure I would melt; it seemed too good to be true. "If you feel well enough Bella, I'm sure everyone would like to know what actually happened."

I stepped forward a few steps and Edward wrapped a long arm around my waist. With my angel by my side I felt as if I could face anything, no matter how good or bad. I knew it was a long road to recovery, but with Edward back, I was ready to begin the next chapter of my life.

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_Ya! The end! I hope you all enjoyed this story. I loved writing it and am anxious to start posting the sequel. However, I'm only on chapter two right now and I want the story to be more developed before I start posting. I hope to hear from you again soon!!!!!!!!!!!! (Oh ya, Review!)_


	16. Sequel!

A/N

Hey, this is just a notice to all those who have me only on story alert, that I have begun to post the sequel Hot as Ice! You can get to it from my profile, I hope you check it out, I'm just as excited for it as I was for this one!


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